I've notice some bickering and hurt feelings on o few of the threads lately. I happen to be one of those who feel there is nothing wrong with disagreement or debate, as long as it doesn't resort to name calling or personal attacks.
It seems to me if all we hear from each other are validations of our own opinions then there is no point in even asking a question, it is hearing different points of view, even those we don't agree with, that allows us to learn from each other.
It's not clear what this had to do with the OPs original complaint about a sibling moving a parent away from the rest of the family, but it has a lot to do with my life and the lives of many of the folks here. The compulsion that a lot of do-nothing sibs have to "blame the victim" jumped right off the page at me, and I jumped right on it. That was I think when the discussion started to unravel. I am not ever going to let someone get away with saying carp like that to a roomful of beleaguered caregivers.
Send... wow, not only am I blind from your new avatar but I'm trying to read through my goulash I just SPLATTED all over my screen! How funny!!
With few exceptions the regulars around this forum are a bunch of pretty compassionate, intelligent, well spoken folks. Most of us have no problem with agreeing to disagree while respecting the others opinion.
And again, I was right in there for a while with everyone else but in hindsight as soon as it turned into a schoolyard brawl I wish I had baled out.
It's really no different than some posts you see, you read through it and think "You've gotta be kidding". You don't respond and keep looking for some intelligent life elsewhere.
I think Gershun said it best, "Nah, why bother". That's the best course sometimes.
Even though some of them were resolved, I resented being treated with a lack of respect. Had I treated any client like that when working for law firms, I would have been fired. So instead of saying what I'd like to say to the medical folks, I'll let some poster like MouseHunter feel my wrath instead. And since Mousey was definitely a provocateur, which is evident from early on, my feeling was that no respectful treatment was necessary to him/her/it or whatever it was.
Those who stir the sh*tpot should have to lick the spoon.
LOL!!!
So now we're back to questions like Will I lose my Medicaid if I marry my ex's brother's BIL who has a house and a huge mortgage, but I love him? :P
That is an unplugged Mouse, electronic mouse in its mouth. Lol.
Suppose now we have to protect the feelings of the OP, since his thread was unplugged, he is still hunting? Splatt!
That is why I stayed around.
But, they are sincere, and may not have caught on at all or not read all the posts prior to posting their heartfelt feelings. Hope everyone is okay now.
We just had this thing with Mouse hunter. And there will be people like that again I'm sure. Real, fake, troll, who knows, it doesn't matter. It livens things up a bit but it gets to people.
I would propose that in the future when it's quite clear there's going to be no resolution to the issues and insults, we bail out. I'm just as guilty as anyone. It's fascinating when this nut bag stuff pops up and hard to ignore and hard not to get drug into circular debates.
But in hindsight it's pretty clear when this thread took a hard left. We all should have bailed out a lot sooner. I'm going to try to avoid getting sucked into this stuff in the future. It was kinda fun though.......
I personally get embarrassed with attention on my issues. Some issues are painful to me. Some people have problems with me, but the majority are kind and supportive. I do not seek to change their minds about me. Often, I have to practice restraining my comments so I won't hurt their feelings. But, just wanted you to know, I too get hurt by life and other caregivers comments. There are people on here that I share my profile with by private messages because I sincerely must (really must) protect others confidentiality.
My husband and I will be alone for the upcoming holidays, with so many birthdays in November, I will send cards to siblings. If you need to private message me for any reason, just do! If we were having a big family meal, we would invite you to join us, and that would not be a mercy invite, it would just be because you are loved. Wouldn't it be nice to have a caregiver's thanksgiving all together??
Maybe a virtual meal will work.
I agree I think everyone here are very polite and good natured in their postings for the most part considering the various backgrounds and such. This forum ministers to me in ways which I'll never be able to articulate. Sometimes in laughter, sometimes tears and sometimes both. I have a lot of gratitude in my heart for the love and support on here.