My mother suffers from heavy delusions and hallucinations and often times I seem to be a trigger. When i visit her at the facility she seems fine until she sees me and then starts to rant and yell, she calls me all kinds of names and gets visibly agitated. She won't even want to walk with me or do anything with me and gets physical. I don't want to stop visiting her but I wonder if not seeing me for a while may cause her to eventually forget me and stop this behavior. Thoughts?
Hopefully in time this too will pass as most things do with dementia.
Other family members visit with no issues. My friend has decided staying away is the best option for now
Who knows what is going on but if you are seeing a pattern here, you’re probably right about your thoughts.
For some reason your visits are instilling either anxiety or excitement that is having the same effect.
My brother's hallucinations from Lewy's dementia were so very improved when he entered his ALF where he had all his care needs met, his meals, me to pay his bills and handle finances and give him his monthly finance sheet to clip into his notebook. He just improved markedly and I was told this isn't unusual.
If your visits are having the opposite effect I would try to figure out, to the best of your ability, exactly why that is so. I can't have a clue. But wish you the very best of luck.
When my cousins visit she’s delightful and charming. All her venom is reserved for me.
The home will slightly sedate her prior to my visits such that I can check on her and her supplies. But I have reduced my visits from weekly to monthly and leave quickly if she recognizes me and lashes out. The staff knows to just tell her she has a visitor, and not identify me.
I think I would call for regular updates from staff where I could.
When visiting to check supplies/clothing needs, pre-arrange staff to take her to the day room or other activity.
I sincerely hope this can improve.
I simply stopped visiting her or being anywhere she was.
Sadly, 'sedating her' actually made it worse. Then her 'filter' was completely gone and the couple of times I saw her like that, it was worse.
I think the idea of sneaky-pete visits to check on your LO is probably best.