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I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
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My 68 year old mother has Squamous cell carcinoma. Inoperable. Supposed to start radiation next week. Hip fracture discovered today in hospital. She refused treatment and insisted on going back to care facility...anyone else face this combo?
Alexandrakl - you are welcome. I am so glad that at least the reason for the fracture is now explained. It is the not knowing or understanding why that can be so difficult. Many times the surgery is not done because the risks outweigh the benefits. I didn't actually mean that your mom was hiding something but rather that she was trying to protect you from knowing that the cancer is progressing; I apologize for my wording that didn't come across quite right. It sounds as though you have a lot on your plate right now; your mother and your grandmother. I hope you have a good support network and are taking care of yourself.
Thank you for replying. I spoke with a good friend who is a Thoracic Oncologist and he said exact same thing. Most likely Pathological. Mom isn't hiding anything from me. She is terrified of surgery and as my friend said most likely she would not survive the surgery. Better to leave it be. It either heals or not. I am coming to terms with all this and about to lose my paternal grandmother as well.
Yes, hip fractures can be fairly common when someone has cancer. I have seen it happen frequently in my 35+ years as a nurse. It is usually a pathological fracture meaning it didn't happen necessarily from falling. Sometimes it is the hip fracturing that causes the fall. If this is the case for your mother then it is usually because the cancer has spread to the bone and caused it to become really porous, fragile and brittle. Your mother being post menopausal when bones become less dense would compound the issue. Did she refuse treatment or was she told that fixing the hip may not be completely possible or would not heal well because the cancer has metastasized? Perhaps this might be the issue and she is not sharing. Can you check with the physician on this? Did your mom give a reason for not taking treatment? Perhaps your mother knows something that you don't? Maybe if you could have a chat with her and try to give her the opportunity to tell you what she knows, what she is afraid of while holding a safe space for her to share this. Hopefully the opening is what she needs and with that it will help you too. My heart goes out to you in this time of uncertainty, frustration and grief.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
It sounds as though you have a lot on your plate right now; your mother and your grandmother. I hope you have a good support network and are taking care of yourself.
I am coming to terms with all this and about to lose my paternal grandmother as well.
Thanks for your input.