My husband HATES it when I wash his private parts, more so in the front than the back. But he is less angry when I wash his legs, hair, and body. So, is he afraid of water or just hates bathing? What’s with the resistance in the private parts? For those of you who had to or are dealing with deal with similar issues, any advice for me?
Can he clean himself? Can you put some body wash on the wash cloth and have him clean himself in the front? This way he can still maintain his dignity... I don't think it's the water because he would have resisted completely to showering/bathing. So, to me, it sounds like a privacy or intimate issue for him... Can you try distraction? When I used to change my dad's pamper, I was always uncomfortable. I always had to have the music radio or the TV on during those times. Meanwhile, my dad would be looking everywhere except at me.
the other thing is to keep him on his back but with a towel over the privates and wash him under that and try not to expose him at all.
I had one spouse who was desperate that I not see her husband's privates after he died but I had to remove a catheter. I just did it under the sheet before she even knew it as she started to object. i did take a quick peek and there was nothing unusual to see!
Is personal care ever provided by others, such as nurses or health care aides? I'm just wondering if it's the thought of being so vulnerable in front of his *wife* that troubles him in particular.
Taking advice from an experienced nurse on how to handle these sensitivities might be one way to go.