I have not been able to find an answer to this question. Can someone with dementia who is angry and delusion at the beginning of the disease become gentle and compliant later as the disease progresses? I hear stories about how a gentle person can become angry and violent but I haven't heard of any longitudinal study of the opposite.
When she came to live with me, she was combative for awhile; but I went to many caregiving classes that taught how to deal with dementia behaviors. Mom lived with me for 2 years. I did my best not to agitate, I tried to keep her happy, my face calm and smiling. She went to daycare and she thought it was work, it gave her a sense of purpose. During those two years she thought she was only visiting me, and she did become herself again. I was told to live in her reality and that is what I do. That does avoid any conflict or agitation.
Now she is memory care and I feel like she is the same sweet person. On a good day, when I go to visit, she will point to the closet and say "are you hungry, there is the refrigerator go get something to eat". Just like when I used to visit her at home. Sad, but it's mom - the same kind sweet person she use to be and I am thankful for that.
She tells me all the time how much she appreciates me and doesn't know what she would do without me.
As I said I guess dementia affects everyone differently.
My fear is wondering when her time comes. A doctor from I believe Medicare stopped by to see my mother, since she doesn't leave the house anymore (she stopped coming down the steps about two or three months ago, which was heartbreaking). Anyway, the doctor took her off her memantene that day. My sister was at home with my mom when the doctor came, as I had been at work. I asked my sister if she happened to ask the doctor how much time my mom had, but she didn't. I'm glad she didn't, because I don't think I could live knowing how much time she had. It kills me every day.....I cherish every moment with her, but I never feel I am doing enough for her. She asks nothing of us, really. She is so quiet. We give her her meals, her few vitamins, etc. Her world has become so tiny, that the thought of it, let alone seeing it every day, just breaks my heart into a million pieces. She was an energetic, highly productive dynamo all her life. Now, she is a mere shell of who she was, and it is beyond heartbreaking. This should have never happened to her. I wish it happened to no one. I love her so deeply, I can't stand feeling so badly for her.