My Mom was diagnosed with early onset dementia 4 years ago. We live together, and I’ve been her caregiver, along with working full time. My Sister lives out of state, and offers no emotional support. She refuses to call my Mom. Lately, my Mom has become doubly incontinent, and has begun waking up in the middle of the night, pulling clothes out of her closet and putting them on her bed.
She can’t even take her medicine anymore without me having to hand her a glass of water. I get so frustrated, I feel exhausted and anxious all the time, and this COVID-19 stuff doesn’t help, as I’m an essential worker who has to work face to face with customers.
I feel I’m going to have to put her in a facility at some point, but she doesn’t have much savings, yet gets too much from social security and her retirement to qualify for Medicaid. I feel trapped.
Can someone set up a Miller's trust at any bank?
When things settle down, speak to a social worker or Council on Aging in your area to help plan for your mom’s future in a facility. They will walk you through the steps.
Be safe and stay well. Best wishes to you and your mom.
Thenthey both qualified.
& it's legal. I pd $2500 ... then I filled Medicaid to save $1500..for dad, $1500 for mom.
It's alot of work, more so time consuming.
Goodluck. There's a light at the end
Cindy
A Certified Nursing Assistant who does hands-on care that about $30 an hour.
If you mom cannot manage her own bowels or bladder--she will no longer be eligible for assisted living and must go into a nursing home.
Are there community day programs in U.S. available for persons with dementia? Here in Canada, the cost per day ranges from $20-30 which includes lunch and activities, kind of like senior daycare. It gives relief to caregivers for at least 6 hours a day. (Of course, these programs are halted during covid).
My father lives in Assisted Living, but many families combine day programs with hiring a private caregiver according to needs and budget. At the beginning of my caregiving journey, I read a book about the subject that said this is one of those problems to "throw money at" if at all possible. If hiring help can buy you some time for self-care, it is worth it.
Even finding 10-15 minutes a day to breathe deeply or journal or walk outside can do wonders for your well-being. Hang in there.