I think it would help her a lot to just chat with someone else who may be living with someone with similiar problems. My mother is in her sixites and retired. I think a few email friends or even area support group would be helpful. she lives near Madison., WI.
Perhaps someone here has or knows of someone who has similar experience. That would be good for you! Another avenue to explore is to Google "ocd support groups wi" and see what you can find that way. The doctor who treats your husband may also have information about local support groups.You are definitely not alone, and finding others will be very helpful.
Good luck.