My grandparents are severely ill. They have had a POA try and convince them to move into assisted living. My 80+ grandmother has had two strokes in one year yet seems more aware of things than my grandfather 80ish who fell recently and has been in extreme pain and heavy pain meds and was released with a catheter a month ago I have no idea who is checking it. I will be seeing them this weekend and calling all doctors to have my name as a release of information. They are being too stubborn and want to die in that house, but for their safety they need out. What do I do?
Have your grandparents signed a release for you to be given information? They have to agree to that.
If they are competent, they can make bad decisions for themselves.
Tell them that you love them and that you'd like to see them get the help they deserve.
If they were doing something that was putting other people's safety at risk, that would be an easy decision. Do everything in your power to stop them from driving, for example. But as BB says, they can make bad decisions for themselves.
Do they each wear a medic alert device? That wouldn't prevent a fall but it could mitigate the consequences somewhat. Are they at risk in the kitchen? Maybe having Meals on Wheels delivered would reduce that risk. Are there grab bars where they are needed? In other words, try to think of ways to reduce the risk right where they are.
If the POA thinks there is enough money to live in an ALF, using some of that money for in-home help might be a good idea.