I don’t know how to respond to her. She has lived in her home for over 40 years but doesn’t believe she is home. I try not to disagree with her, but she keeps accusing us of conspiring against her. She says we want her dead so we can have all the money, which couldn’t be further from the truth. I have quit my job to assist my parents so they can stay in their home. Then other times she is her normal sweet, loving self.
As other above has suggested, distraction or using "therapeutic fibs" can be helpful.
"Yes, but aren't we lucky to have something so much like your house while the water main is being fixed? The kitchen is even like yours. Shall I make us some tea?"
Have some snacks your mom enjoys and when she begins to worry about where her house is offer her a little snack. Is she on anti-anxiety medication? That may help. And do as Sue suggests, when your mom begins to talk about the house remove yourself from the discussion.
This stage is so difficult.
Arguing doesn't work, the brain is broken and they don't have the capability to figure it out. You can't really agree with her either, due to the nature of her accusations.
The only thing that partially worked for me was distraction. You could try to change the subject but usually they catch on to that.
"Remember" that you have something on the stove, you need to use the restroom, you have to make a phone call, you need a drink of water...anything to break up the discussion. Some days my mother just won't let it go no matter what I do. Unfortunately, we need to remove ourselves from the situation or we will become very frustrated.
I wish I had a better answer. Like I said, this is one of the awful parts of Alzheimer's.