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I can't get her to do anything. My mother was with my sister in N.C for 8 mos. She will be with me now. All she does is sleep day and night. I can't get her to do anything. Is this normal? I am very worried and frustrated. I have trouble also getting her to eat. The Dr. say it is ok to let her sleep but I find it hard to believe as back in Oct she was not doing this. She has deteriorated since she has been with my sister in N.C. I just feel that all this sleep is not normal and there is something else that I could be doing to help her get past it. Please does anyone have suggetions?

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My mother is 94 years old and all she wants to do is sleep.I wake her up to eat,(she does eat one good meal a day and drinks ensure in the morning) she gets up to use the bathroom. I get her seated in her chair and she sleeps in it. I was told her little body is tired, let her sleep. Somedays we are talking 18 to 20 hours sleep. Is all this a normal process of a"tired little body"?
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My 78 year old Mom would rather sleep than do anythng else. She says she enjoys her dreams and is okay with sleeping 14 to 18 hours a day. Lately when she is awake she sits with her eyes closed or dozes off. She really can't go more than a couple of hours without laying down. I am very concerned and she has been to an assortment of doctors.Until 2009 she was one of the most active and busy people I knew. She was diagnoised with mild dementia and takes Aricept, otherwise she is very healthy. It's hard to watch such a vibrant active woman just stop living her life.

I do my best to keep her engaged in activities that she enjoys. When there is an event she wants to get up for such as church, doctors appt, bridge game, it's like pulling teeth to get her up and ready.

What else can I do? I'm afraid all this sleeping is going to lead to other health problems.
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Same thing with my MIL, she would sleep all day and night if I did not wake her to drink and eat. She sleeps more at night now too...she use to get up like 5-8 times a night to pee, now she sleeps. One problem is a UTI and the antibiotic. Doctor says it is ok. She has moderate dementia too, so alot going on here..maybe your mom is having UTI? My MIL doctor does not seem too concerned given her age and moving here, plus the UTI...I dont feel good about it either, but apparently as long as we get them to drink and eat so that they do not dehydrate then apparently geriatric doctor here says ok. She is 88 yrs old and had bad fall 3 weeks ago also..alot, but I suppose even without all of that he was not real concerned due to age and the dementia???? Hope this helps, but I would still talk to your sis and the doctor just in case.
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My 93 year old mother was at home this past spring,summer, and fall at her lake property. She did not get dressed, slept a lot, and was extra irritable.
When she came to spend the winter with us for the third year, she never dressed and spent most of her time in bed.
She just moved into an independent living facility with meals in the dining room. She dresses every day, showers with the help of an available CNA, and is visiting.Having new people to meet seems to help.
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My mom is 88 y.o, she has alz, kidney failure,macular degeneration, is deaf and broke her hip 3 years ago and now can't walk. She sleeps all night and has extreme nightmares, see's people, and screams to me. She eats at the most 1/4 cup of food a day and sleeps most of the time. There is nothing that we have found that she can or will do. She can't hear so it's hard to have a conversation with her, she can't see, so TV, reading knitting etc are out. Forgets things from one sec to the next. We try to take her out for walks in her wheelchair and she refuses to go. If we go anywhere and she goes with us all we here is I want ot go home. So most of the time my husband stays home when I go shopping and I stay home when he goes out. We never get to go out together. We have not been capable of getting any help from any orginazation. They all refuse to help us. But I'm worried about her not eating or drinking and sleeping so much.
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MOM:

Looks like a classic case of severe depression, but I'd also take a good look at all the medications she's taking. They might be knocking her out and rendering her too tired to have a bite.

DON'T let her waste away. She must be evaluated immediately. Good luck.

-- Ed
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My mom is 94 and she too spends a lot of time in bed. She says "I feel good in bed!". She may have a mild dementia, that is memory problems, low interest, don't initiate much. She likes music but does not put any CD. Like Ruemando's mother, she would be much more active if she had her own personal trainer.
I tend to think "Fine! You like to be in bed; be in bed. I just want you to be happy." When I spend a week with her, I sew and do projects; she likes me to show her my progress regularly. She is a very nice mom. I love her so much.
I told her "playing cards between 7:00 and 9:00 pm is enough for me, OK?" She goes to a center 3 days /week from 9:00 to 3:00.
But those doctors pile guilt and worries on me when they claim that sleeping during the day will lead to weaker bones, poor balance, creating a bad cycle of inactivity both mentally and physically. When I tell her that, she says "I'm the one who is 94. I do what a 94 years old body can do."
What is the real problem here? Has being active become a must, the only way of living? Some people meditate and it's OK. Why can't old people enjoy taking it easy in bed? Why do we immediately fear depression?
What if our old parents were allowed to relax in bed, do a 5 minutes of stretching exercises before each meal and do as they please?
A contact with people every day, family visiting every Saturday and Sunday, and the rest, - well -, weaker bones and poor balance is what getting older and older do to our bodies. Are we supposed to die on the treadmill?
When I ask my mom, it goes nowhere. She just wants to be nice to me; discussing a point is no longer important for her. It's like all she wants is hearing our voices, smiling back, hugs. Between visits, she just waits for the next one. Time has a different meaning for her than for us. I have things to do, but she doesn't; I have energy, she doesn't. It seems to make all the difference in our respective world.
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Just to relate my experience with my Dad, he used to sleep constantly and only got up occasionally to eat --- several years. He was on an anti-depressant and a counselor came to the house. After his hip surgery a few months ago, I realized I would need to hire a caregiver for my Dad in addition to the caregiver we already had who was taking care of Mom. Although our private caregiver was able to take care of both parents before surgery, Dad needed more care and attention post surgery.

Fortunately our caregiver's husband was available part time and had experience AND agreed to help out. That's when his behavior began to change. He would stay awake for longer and longer periods of time. I think it was because he had a companion and his companion initiated activities --- engaged Dad in things Dad liked to do. Dad likes crossword puzzles, trivia games, doing searches on the internet --- Google earth takes you anywhere you want to go and he especially likes to go to the town he grew up in -- looking at old pictures.

We're now on the 5th month that he has been waking up in the morning and staying awake until about 4pm when he takes a nap before dinner ... then stays up until bedtime.
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My mom is 98 she is always very sleepy, she doesn't like to go to bed ones she gets up in the morning, she dresses and sits on her recliner chair tries to watch TV or even do iPad but she keeps falling sleep doing those and she eats ok. Reason for being sleepy?? Please help
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My dad is 93 and just came to live with us. My mom past away on 11/07/16 and they were married for 56 years. He wakes up calling her name at times. He says he can't get over this lonely feeling he has. I have told him that it will take time and prayer to get past this lonely feeling. He is on medication for COPD and CHF, as well as, constant oxygen. He sleeps most of the day into the night. My children and try to engage him but after that short period he just goes back to sleep. Sometimes, I feel like I have lost two parents and not one. I am feeling very frustrated because I feel like I am failing at caring for him because he is not engaged like he used to be. Help???
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