Not a question, but a thank you.

Just wanted to say this forum has helped me through the time caring for my mother. I lost my mother last month and it is definitely the hardest thing to go through. As a caregiver, I read the articles and realized I was not alone in being a caregiver to my parent and there were a lot of helpful suggestions. Our plan was for mom to remain home and I told mom as long as I was able to take care of her she would. However, overnight the situation changed. Something happened that took mom downhill fast and in 5 days I wasn't able to care for her and she was transferred to a Hospice Care Facility where they told me to concentrate on being a daughter and let the hospice family take care of mom. That was hard to do and they were very patient with me as I struggled to let them do the things for mom that I had done for so many years. Yes, my husband and I put our life on hold to take care of mom and we have no regrets. It's a struggle at times but those times are memories in the making. We talked about her younger years, how she met my dad, going through the depression, flood, world war 2, etc. I was fortunate in the fact that my mom and I done everything together. We worked together as a nurse's aide, school bus driver, and school custodian from the time I started my working career until she retired. We drove to work together, we went for rides in the winter months just to look at the scenery, my husband and I took both our moms on a 3 week trip across country to the Pacific Ocean then across the northern states from Washington to the Dakota's and home, so for me, this goes beyond the normal mom and daughter relationship. Dad passed in 2014, mom went legally blind in 2015 and then it seemed every year another major health issue came up so between doctor visits, ER visits, and hospital stays, it seemed non-ending at times. I spent many nights and sometimes a week at a time in the hospital with mom throughout the 10 years. Being legally blind and all her health issues was frightening for her to be alone in a strange place. Fortunately I was able to stay with her. It is difficult to be a 24/7 caregiver without time off but we made do. I did what I could do to make mom laugh and enjoy life. She couldn't do much but she was happy. For those caregivers that have siblings that don't come around, I was in the same situation but the last couple of days they all came to see mom but it was too late. She could no longer visit with them. My heart aches for them because of the days they could have and should have, they chose not to and that is something they will have to live with. It is important as a caregiver to know what your parent(s) want in their final days. I know it didn't all go as mom and I had planned but I had to do what was best for mom. Mom was able to make her own decisions up to the day she had her 2nd stroke and 5 days later I wasn't able to care for her any longer. The doctor said it was a brain stem stroke and nothing could be done at that point. As a caregiver, do it with Love and you'll never regret your decision. It will not always be easy but in the end, you'll never regret it. Cherish the memories you make during that time. Life does come full circle. Our parents take care of us when we came into this world and we take care of them when they are getting ready to leave this world.