If my mom has to live in a nursing home will they just take all her money?

if I pay the expenses for my parent to live a assistant living facility and my parent goes to a nursing home, am I entiled to get my money back out of the sale of my parents house before ss take over the house?

dberry - Not really, unless you have in place a legal contract with your parents, that states that they owe you for all monies spent on them. $ and time your spend on your parents without a contract for services, is viewed as normal love, care and compassion between family members.

SS doesn't "take over the house" nor does the NH or AL facility.

SS has nothing to do with your parents home BUT if your parents apply to go onto MedicAID to pay for NH costs their SS monthly income MUST be paid to NH.

The AL or NH facility doesn't take over the home, all they want to be paid for their services whether it's private pay, LTC insurance or Medicaid (if they participate).

If your parents have a home it is an exempt asset for Medicaid review, so it does not have to be sold for them to go onto Medicaid if they meet all the other medical and financial criteria for Medicaid. BUT all their $ (whether assets or income) must be spend on them or their care in the NH. So there will be- in reality- none of mom or dad's $ to pay for whatever (taxes, yard, utilities, etc) on the house. So either family comes up with the $ to do that or the house ends up being sold. This is where it gets sticky and your need to speak with an elder care attorney who practices in the county where the property is located. My mom is in a NH and still has her home. Under her states Medicaid guidelines if the house is empty (which it is) and she still maintaines it as her principal homestead (which she does) then upon her death, I can let MERP (Medicaid Estate Recovery Program) know that I plan on filing an exemption for all expenses that I or another family member have paid on the property from Day 1 on of her NH stay. And that exemption amount is deducted from the MERP tally on her. MERP is not automatic and MERP does an evaluation on whether to even file a claim or lein against the estate. MERP has to go through probate court under whatever the death laws are in your state. My mom's state is a claim state and MERP a class 7 claim, so MERP recovery is low as there are 6 other levels of claims paid first. Still happens but lower than a state where MERP is an = claim state or an actual lein placed state. Now if instead, the house was sold today, then all the proceeds from the sale of the house has to then be spent on her needs and her care at the NH. Now each state does this differently, and some states have it where they are disqualified completely from Medicaid and have to go through the spend down at the NH and then reapply but the $ is self-directed for spending; other states have it where they are still accepted in the Medicaid program but ineligible for Medicaid until all the funds spent on their care with the state having oversight in some way on the funds. The attorney will know what's what for you. Good luck.

Mother is in a nursing home at this point May or may not have to stay She wants to gift each of her sons (4) $5000.00 for Christmas.May she do0 that??? If so, would they have to come up with that amount to give back if she has to eventually go on Medicaid in a few months or years ??

If she may need to apply for Medicaid within the next five years it really isn't a good idea to be giving away assets now.

This would be a good time to consult an attorney specializing in Elder Law. Get things lined up to be able to apply in the most advantageous way.

My brother and my mother have a a joint bank account, both savings and checking. Can he take the money, or half the money before she goes into a nursing home and avoid the 5 year look back?

My Mother has a whole life insurance policy, cash value approximately $6,500, which she wants to be used to pay for her funeral services. If she first has to go on Idaho Medicaid, how do we preserve those funds to cover her final expenses?

Say a person works in a nursing home and she/he sees patient abuse 1st hand and they report it to their supervisor but nothing happens, because its their word against the abusers word and because he /she hasn't worked there very long and the place is already short handed he/she feels like thats the reason nothing is being done. What would be the next legal steps that they should take?

Angels Watching - please, because this is an important situation which may get overlooked by being tacked on at the end of an irrelevant posting - please make a separate question out of this.

I myself don't know what the next legal steps should be, but someone else may have run into this same situation and have some helpful answers for you.

There is a box at the top of the first page of the forum that says "What is your question" and then the orange button beside that says "submit". That's where you type in your question. Hope you get a better response.

I want to first ask for compassionate responses, if possible, because I'm already wracked with guilt about even asking this question. Okay, I currently live with my mother in our family home. I moved back to NJ in 2009 to renovate the house so that my parents could have a senior suite on the main floor and I would take the top floor. My mother's knee issues were making it almost impossible for her to climb the 16 stairs to the top floor. She has since had two knee replacement operations. My move was to be temporary but in 2010, at the surprising age of 43, I got pregnant. I had my son in 2011. Both my parents were a great blessing and support and as a single mom with a demanding job in IT I decided to remain in the home during my son's first two years. Because of work stress, I resigned from my job in 2013, looking to make a career change that would allow me more time with my son. Note, throughout this time and when I moved home I paid rent and helped with household expenses, along with $30000+ dollars in renovation costs. In May 2013, my incredibly healthy 76 year old dad suffered a cervical spinal injury which left him paralyzed from the neck down. It took our family through a tailspin, but praise God after surgery and extensive rehab, he regained much of his mobility but is wheel chair bound and requires full tine nursing care. The family home has too many levels, narrow doorways and other barriers for him to have returned home and neither I or my mom would have been able to care for a strapping 6'2 man. He was qualified for Medicaid so that was a blessing. However, my job situation got further put on hold as I was dealing with his care, a toddler and my elderly mom.at home who started showing signs of dementia. This year, I finally was blessed with a job, back in IT. So, what's the question? As i mentioned, my mother is in the early stages of dementia. As she was always a bit narcissistic and a rage a holic, the dementia has exacerbated those behaviors. It's been frightening at times and stressful living with her. Many here have talked about the paranoia, accusations, being cussed out, etc. She was on an anti psychotic for a while, and also anti anxiety and anti depressant meds, but now just on namenda and aricept. Her moods are more balanced. However, I am weary and tired. She is able to manage (still shop for food, drive to familiar places), I put all her bills on automatic bill pay (though she is suspicious about that and how stuff is getting paid). My son is five and I want a home just for me and him. I want to move. However, I'm wracked with guilt about doing so and then also angry cause I'll still have to help manage her household and mine and my dad in the nursing home. It's damned if I do, damned if I don't. My peace would be if she sold the home and went to live in an assisted/adult living apt and not this big, older home that constantly needs work. She uses two rooms in the whole house - the kitchen and bedroom. She sits in her bdrm all day watching tv. She doesn't need this big house. However, if she sells, how much of the sale can she keep and how much will Medicaid want? That's the question I wanted to pose. I would appreciate any insight. Thank you.

I came across this resource (facilityresourcegroup website) and found it very helpful for my mother. They helped me secure government benefits to pay for skilled care at a great facility without losing her assets. Normally, we would have to spend down her assets to qualify for government assistance. I had no idea there this was an option. Mom got a great skilled care facility and we did not have to pay for it or spend down assets to receive government assistance..

I came across this resource (facilityresourcegroup website) and found it very helpful for my mother. They helped me secure government benefits to pay for skilled care at a great facility without losing her assets. Normally, we would have to spend down her assets to qualify for government assistance. I had no idea there this was an option. Mom got a great skilled care facility and we did not have to pay for it or spend down assets to receive government assistance..

Gosh, there ought to be a law on the amount a nursing home can charge for a resident. YES they will take all your money. Now days I think that is the idea...for the GOV to get ones last penny.

I am just now starting to go through this...I have no money, no job, no family to help me....I am in so much pain, health premiums, deductible for me, I am 62, is so high I cannot afford to pay for my health....seriously, the ONLY way out I can see is suicide....I worked all my life, to pay for those that are on welfare, no I need help, I can go to h*ll, because I am over the hill....there should be a little pill to end it all...I am not just in pain, physically...I am suffering.

Are you a veteran?

phuckme:
Every county in the US has an Aging and Disability Resource Center (sometimes called Area Agency on Aging) that acts as a clearing house of sorts for all federal and state programs available to assist the elderly and disabled including guidance as to health insurance options, Medicaid, Medicare, and SSI related programs. I would also suggest looking into applying for Social Security Disability Insurance which would automatically permit Medicare eligibility after 2 years (may or may not be an advantage depending how far you are into your 62 year).
The Agency in your area can be found here: http://agencyonaging4.org/services/