Follow
Share

I was my grandad caregiver his only living daughter is a drunk and drug addict, he gave me durable unlimited poa, i knew what he wanted done with his car so i transfered it before his death i also knew what he wanted done with his savings account money which was very little, his daughter wasnt there over last 10yrs she came only 2times to see him and both times he has me hide his meds and hold his wallet, before death i also closed his savings account, not even 32hrs after his passing she has his trailer cleaned out and damaged the property she was even there when he was taken off life support then at his military honors burial she started a fight with my 19yr old over his flag, she is threatening to sue me because i transfered the car and closed his savings before he passed so i know his wishes would be carried out as he wanted them i did this because before he passed she was already talking about selling everything to pay off what she owed to courts and fines and to get drugs, the police did nothing about her taking his meds after death she was so messed up on his meds she filed a false police report, was i in the right to make sure his wishes were carried out and can she aue me for that

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Find Care & Housing
His daughter is executor of the will but never filed probate for a judge to actually name her because of her history in nc if you have been in jail you cam not be an exutor of a will... it was not my place to empty his trailer out i just wanted to do right by grandad and carry his wishes on the two things and thats what i did his will was done in2001 so the car was not part of it, i have nothing to do with her at all i do hope she gets the helps she needs, grandad was very aware when he signed the poa and health care poa, it was done at an attorney's office and the attorney made sure he knew what he was doing and signed both papers as a whitness, if she does sue i will tell the judge everything from start to finish,
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Don't get drawn into her illness, which is drug abuse. If she cares to get well, she can seek the help of Reformers Unanimous website
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

You did good, from start to finish. Don't let anyone tell you differently.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Be grateful for the time you got to spend with your granddad. Put his drug-addled daughter out of your mind and don't give her a second thought. Lawyers aren't stupid and they can spot a drug addict. And don't hesitate to get a restraining order on her should it come to that.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Did he have a will? If so, who was the executor? POA stops at time of death. Is your Mom in the will, if not she was not entitled with touching his belongings. Are u executor?
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

If he had a will, and the daughter was a beneficiary that you did not give an inheritance to - she MIGHT have a case. Small estates usually don't get much attention from lawyers since the recovery is not likely or much. Just document the events in case she files a case with Adult Protective Services saying that you defrauded the elderly person. Sometimes those get investigated, but if you did not enrich yourself, you should be able to show why you transferred car and to who and where the cash from savings went - especially if it went to help pay for funeral expenses or caregiver contract.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I'm so sorry to here this, I doubt that she can do anything. I went through something similar a few years ago, my ex passed. He had 2 sons one was a very bad drunk and drug addict. I was told that when something happened to him to not give that son anything and to make sure it went to the other. I did exactly that, there was a lot of hard feelings but I was told over and over, they still once in a while (when I say they I mean the drunk son and his Mother) asking questions about things. I can only imagine what your going through not only are you grieving for the person you lost but to go through something like this is not what anyone wants to do. They threatened me but that is all it ever was, most of the time when someone drinks and does drugs that is all it ever turns out to be is threats, their to messed up in there mind to accomplish anything. Best of luck to you and I'm sorry for your loss.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Yes, you were right and you have nothing to feel guilty about, and any threats by the daughter are just that - threats. I doubt if she has the money to hire an attorney, and then her past history can be brought into the case. Just do not talk with her anymore and hope she gets help for her addictions.
Helpful Answer (4)
Report

Addicts can often threaten, but what would be accomplished by it? No lawyer would take a case like this. It is unfortunate that she is doing this, but it is her problem, not yours. I understand your discomfort as having to deal with her threats, but they are quite likely empty threats.
Helpful Answer (5)
Report

As long as you were carrying out his wishes, and you actually did what he specified then you were doing the right thing. Anyone can sue. However, in this particular case, you're should be fine as long as you can prove that you were doing the right thing for your loved one. Being able to show proof is what will cover you should a lawsuit come up. Again, as long as your loved one specifically requested you to do certain things, there's no reason to bring a lawsuit against you if you were just carrying out those wishes.

You mention how he had you hold his wallet and hide his meds when this other person visited, good for him from what you described. I'm actually quite surprised that you didn't clean out his residence before this other person did. Around here, when anyone living alone is placed into a nursing home, the belongings are removed from the residence at the time of the nursing home placement or shortly after. That way, there are no looters getting in and treating the place like a free for all. In your carries, I'm terribly sorry that this happened to be the end result. I can only hope that this particular person gets her life straightened out before it's too late.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

If he gave you "he gave me durable unlimited poa" then he did SIGN it , yes?
If he signed it then you are good to go and she has nothing on you.

As someone stated here ''did he have dementia'? in his right mind?

The daughter may say you took advantage bla bla bla

But when you go to the bank (in my experience) if they see you are taking advantage of a senior, FLAGS will raise.

I guess. because of his history with daughter being what she is, I would have gotten it on tape or film. but as far as I know, as long as he signed it you are okay.

Also. HOW would the daughter take you to court? with her drug money? doubt it. I am sure if that did happen the judge would side with you.
PS....did he sign the car to YOU? is this why the daughter is mad?

PPS....good for you in carrying out his wishes. :)
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

I'm sorry that you're having such a terrible time. Since he gave you durable POA you should not have any legal issues. You knew what he wanted and carried it through. You should be okay.
Take care,
Carol
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Did granddad have dementia, or was he "in his right mind" when he died?

Did he sign to transfer the car title, or did you do it as POA?

I'm not sure if she might have any possible legal grounds to sue you, but under the circumstances I would say to her, "Aunt Greedy, you go ahead and do whatever you feel you must do. My conscience is clear. I'll see you in court, if that is what you decide." I'd count on her not having her act together enough to go through with it.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter