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Thank you to everyone who replied. I value all the comments. I have come to the conclusion that I may certainly be too suspicious. Like I said earlier, this is still new to me. But if I had to take a wild guess I would say that perhaps because the aide didn't know I was my father's daughter they wanted to simply do a little checking up. For all they knew I could be a woman he met online. Right? In fact if I'm right about that then I really feel feel great about where my father is. They're keeping a close eye on him.
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JoAnn29 Nov 21, 2023
Aides do not check up on who visits residents. Being in an AL is like renting an apartment but you have aides to help u with ADLs.

Its not the staffs responsibility to oversee the lives of residents. The only time they may get involved is if a visitor tends to upset a resident. The resident can ask that the person not be allowed in. Or, make the family aware of it so they have the ability to ban the person. But, I don't really think if a family member asked for a staff member to spy on a resident they are obligated to do that or should. I just think its Lisa making a mountain out of a molehill.
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"An aide said hello to you and then came in the room and looked at flowers . HOW is this impacting your Dad’s care ?"

It is - in a good way. I just want to know if it's not unusual for aides to check in with residents if residents are having visitor(s) who the aides do not know.

Understanding why things really happened and people's motivations are something I believe everyone should strive to know. The world would be a far better place if that was the case.
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lealonnie1 Nov 21, 2023
You'll never understand such a thing, ever, and striving to is a huge waste of time. If you want such an answer, ask the CAREGIVER why she did what she did.
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Family socialization should not be intruded upon by aides without any other purpose though.

My in laws aide, for example, used to go into her room by herself when any of us came over. Now she doesn’t remove herself or her niece from the sitting room meaning conversations within the family have to be arranged around her.
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lisatrevor Nov 21, 2023
I don't know what the second part of your post means but the aide in my father's place did not know me or my relationship with my father. Like I said, my theory or rather guess, is that the aide was just checking in to make sure everything was on the up and up. Now they know me my guess is that they will not interrupt again unless it's for medication or treatment or cleaning or whatever their official duties are.
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I don’t think so. It’s common, and a good thing, that the residents and staff are friendly. They spend all day every day there! My mom has struck up a friendship with the lady that cleans the apartments. When I go to visit she talks about “Nancy” all the time or is chatting with her. I’m so happy she has friends in her new home. My occasional visits certainly aren’t enough socialization.
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