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My mother recently decided to sell her home and move to an independent living apartment that is part of a continuing care community. She’s very concerned about how long her money will last, but she thinks she can swing it. Unfortunately, the facility she chose doesn’t anticipate an opening for as much as a year.



About a week ago, she fell at home and fractured her clavicle. She’s currently in rehab at her chosen facility (in the skilled unit). This is the second serious fall; 18 months ago she broke her hip. I’m starting to think she may need assisted living sooner than we think. She doesn’t remember the recent fall; she said she woke up on the floor. And of course assisted living will consume her resources even faster.



My question: are there any possible sources of assistance we could be looking into? Her husband served in the Army Air Corps in WW2. I don’t believe they were married more than 20 years at his death, if that makes any difference.

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iameli: Perhaps your mother requires residence in an assisted living facility.
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You have good , valid concerns and questions. I encourage you to speak with a Social Worker or Case Manager to begin the assessment of both her realistic care needs and, the questions about VA. and or other benefits to assist you mother. If you are the officially designated POA for your mother you can probably call or go by a VA office and inquire ; most times you will need the former active duty person 's ( her deceased spouse) DD214 and or other veteran or social documents they ( VA) require. At minimum a VA office should be able to explain the requirements for benefits and tell you what documents you, your mother will need. You can also Google
" spouse VA benefits" and possibly have your questions answered about if and how to go forward. If you are not the POA, be sure to get this officially assigned by your mother while she is still cognitively, mentally alert and oriented to make her wishes known. A competent Social Worker ( should be one available at facility) can help you with this. If someone else is the POA then you may need them to request info.
Take care of yourself, get good support for your own needs to help avoid caregiver exhaustion. Speak with your clergy or a chaplain for spiritual support and affirmation. Eat well, stay hydrated, exercise as you are able.
Blessings...
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Don't pay someone to get VA Aid & Attendance. Your local VA Office will do the forms for free. It's time consuming but if she gets A&A, her first check will cover from the date of application. VA approved my Mom's application in about 90 days.
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stephm1 Oct 2022
I recently contacted our local VA office and they were outstanding in working with us. Ecellent advice, Becky04469.
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We used patriot angels to help obtain my moms Aid and Attendance VA pension. I have heard mixed reviews about them (it’s a law office in Tennessee, we had to pay $750 a few years back) but we found them very helpful. We were able to get her approved in 6 months, which I thought was pretty good.
According to Patriot Angels, they basically tell you if you’re going to be eligible or not before you actually pay them. Again, I dunno how accurate that is, but it worked for us and made the process fairly seamless. BUT, read reviews.
Also, there are Veterans Service Office in many counties, ours is in the local VA hospital. They are very helpful.

in either case, gather as much info about her husband’s service record, marriage and death certificate as you can, they also need resource info, that is the toughest part. But if she qualifies she’ll get around $1400 per month, which can make a big difference in stretching her savings!

You can just Google patriot angels and read reviews.

Also, speak with the social work office at the rehab perhaps they can provide you with info about funding options, which could steer you toward the best Assisted Living option.
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My MIL just moved into a board and care (assisted living in residential neighborhood) . She is a widow of Korean War veteran. She will be getting VA Aid and Attendance soon. It will give her $1300-1400 monthly which will go towards her board and care bill of $4000 per month. It will be a big help. The application process was done through our local VA office which then submitted it to the federal office. There is quite a lot of paperwork involved! They estimate once submitted the actual benefit is received in about 3 to 6 months. However it is paid retroactive to application date. I hope you find something that works for your mom.
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Call Patriot Angels at 844-757-3047…. they can check to see if she may qualify for Aid & Assistance.
He would have had to be in the service (1 day) during the time of war and married one year.
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XenaJada Oct 2022
Would she have needed to be married to him while he was in service?
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Since some federal is involved here I suggest you telephone or better yet visit your congressman(or womens) office. Things happen when they are involved. Good luck.
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Contact the local VA Clinic. Your mom should qualify for assistance. Please get her evaluated for osteoporosis too.
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JoAnn29 Oct 2022
VA hospitals do not take spouses. Only the Vet can get these services. I know of two friends that are Viet Nam Vets and use the VA hospital as their suppliment to Medicare. Their wives need their own suppliment.
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Call the Veterans Office. The have benefits for widows of veterans.
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Your local Veterans Assistance Commission can help determine what benefits she would be entitled to. Often the VA is pretty busy so you might get a faster response from the Assistance Commission.
Also each State will have a Department of Veterans' Affairs you can google that information. (your State) Department of Veteran's Affairs.
I also think that she should probably look into Assisted Living rather than Independent Living
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I would definitely NOT place mom in IL; she needs AL for CERTAIN! Call your VA office or go to VA.GOV for info. Aid & Attendance benefits are federal, but you'd need to apply at your local VA office in Iowa. Here is a link to that office:

https://va.iowa.gov/

If her husband served during active wartime, then she's likely eligible for spousal benefits under the Aid & Attendance benefits he was entitled to. My mother got $1431 (I believe) that I applied to her Memory Care AL rent every month and it helped make her funds last a lot longer. She'll have to meet the eligibility requirements, however, about how much $$ she has in the bank and income, etc.

Wishing you the best of luck!
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iameli Oct 2022
Thanks so much for the information.
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Call your local VA office they can tell you if your Mom is eligible for any benefits. If you have your Dad’s Dd224 is very helpful.
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Sorry I don't have the answer for you, but if you click on the Veterans Benefits bubble below your question you may find something helpful.
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