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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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When does seeing people that are not there start? Going through and moving everything has been occurring for some time, and is quite draining... recently she sees people that are not there... any insight is appreciated...
Sorry, it's so rough. It can be exhausting to supervise and care for a person with dementia. The medication did help my LO. It seemed to make her more content, but, she still had her moments. She takes several meds now to address her anxiety, depression and agitation. If she's not doing better, with the med, I'd discuss it with her doctor. Sometimes, they have to change or adjust it.
My LO liked to move things around too. Of course, she had no memory of doing it. She would even disconnect the cable box and put it in the kitchen cupboards. lol I looked for it for over an hour, before stumbling on it.
Delusions were also present, but, none that scared her. She mainly saw friendly little animals and her favorite tv personalities. So, that wasn't too problematic.
I hope that you have plenty of help. It does get to be more challenging when they are wheelchair bound and incontinent.
Can you get respite time? I'd try to take breaks and have some private time. Oh, also, if she likes to keep her hands moving, you might check on some activity toys for those with dementia and other disabilities that allows them to use their hands. Some have zippers, velcro, buttons, etc. These toys allow them to keep their hands busy. I never used them with my LO, because my LO was never able to do an activity without direct supervision. Even then, she lost interest in a few seconds.
Thank you for not judging...her psychiatrist prescribes Zoloft and Ativan to calm her and to help her sleep( Ativan is low dose only before bed). They say to go with the flow and not to engage...so much easier said , than done! In all honesty I don’t know if I even agree with what the psych and other doctor says, a lot of times I think the meds make the symptoms worse but how many times can the change them? We all realize she will never get better... however one of us is against outside care, and I’m not that one... I’m beginning to wonder if it would help everyone involved...sigh...
Wornout19, it is overwhelming. Feel free to rant here. No one will judge you!
Is she on any medications for the confusion? What do her doctors suggest?
Have you considered the option of placing her in a care center with an appropriate level of care? This is not like your loved one has measles and you can all tough it out until she gets better. Dementia progresses. It gets worse. She is not going to "get better."
She is at home, with three of us caring for her...the confusion is unbelievable, and I do believe to a point this is why she goes through everything. It takes hours sometimes days to get things back to some sort of order, but by then she has torn 3 more things apart...she has the habit of unplugging things too...freezers or the refrigerator. She has taken the washing machine apart on several occasions... she is almost always unpleasant to be around either arguing or being flat out nasty... doesn’t eat or sleep right...the list is endless. In a way I guess I’m just ranting a bit but my gosh this is so overwhelming...
Wornout19, there are about 50 kinds of dementia. Some involve hallucinations early on, some have hallucinations in later stages, and some don't usually include hallucinations at all. Delusions ("the president bought me dinner") are common to many kinds of dementia, in various stages.
Once I found my husband standing in front of my open closet. I asked him jokingly if he was looking for a shirt he could borrow. "I'm just seeing what is what," was his reply. When everything is so confusing and unfamiliar it is common for dementia patients to want to sort things or look at things or move them around.
So there really isn't a good answer to your question. If the doctors have a pretty good idea of what kind of dementia your loved one has, they may be able to provide some guidance.
Does your loved one live with you? If it is becoming too draining to care for her where she is, perhaps it is time to consider a care center.
Wornout, this is all part of the process of dementia. My mom would see pictures on the wall there weren't there and tell me that she saw old co-workers pushing brooms, and insisted that she saw several past presidents (one had a concert at the end of the street, one brought her dinner from a restaurant, etc.) She would move small pictures and hide her TV remote under a Kleenex so no one could "steal" it.
I know what you are going through. Is she living with you or alone? My mom lived alone and finally, I had to move her to a memory care unit for her own safety. Please keep us informed.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
My LO liked to move things around too. Of course, she had no memory of doing it. She would even disconnect the cable box and put it in the kitchen cupboards. lol I looked for it for over an hour, before stumbling on it.
Delusions were also present, but, none that scared her. She mainly saw friendly little animals and her favorite tv personalities. So, that wasn't too problematic.
I hope that you have plenty of help. It does get to be more challenging when they are wheelchair bound and incontinent.
Can you get respite time? I'd try to take breaks and have some private time.
Oh, also, if she likes to keep her hands moving, you might check on some activity toys for those with dementia and other disabilities that allows them to use their hands. Some have zippers, velcro, buttons, etc. These toys allow them to keep their hands busy. I never used them with my LO, because my LO was never able to do an activity without direct supervision. Even then, she lost interest in a few seconds.
Is she on any medications for the confusion? What do her doctors suggest?
Have you considered the option of placing her in a care center with an appropriate level of care? This is not like your loved one has measles and you can all tough it out until she gets better. Dementia progresses. It gets worse. She is not going to "get better."
she is almost always unpleasant to be around either arguing or being flat out nasty... doesn’t eat or sleep right...the list is endless. In a way I guess I’m just ranting a bit but my gosh this is so overwhelming...
Once I found my husband standing in front of my open closet. I asked him jokingly if he was looking for a shirt he could borrow. "I'm just seeing what is what," was his reply. When everything is so confusing and unfamiliar it is common for dementia patients to want to sort things or look at things or move them around.
So there really isn't a good answer to your question. If the doctors have a pretty good idea of what kind of dementia your loved one has, they may be able to provide some guidance.
Does your loved one live with you? If it is becoming too draining to care for her where she is, perhaps it is time to consider a care center.
I know what you are going through. Is she living with you or alone? My mom lived alone and finally, I had to move her to a memory care unit for her own safety. Please keep us informed.