List of likes and dislikes
I was just replying to this post: https://www.agingcare.com/questions/poawhat-the-476966.htm
It came to me that I knew what my Mom liked, didn't like and shouldn't have. She did not like scrambled eggs, was suppose to watch certain foods because of Gerd and had to wear a cotton bra because she would get a yeast rash if skin was on skin. It came to me replying to this post that my girls probably have no idea of my likes and dislikes.
This is a list we should have on our parents especially if we don't live near them. What foods do they not like. What foods bother them. Certain OTC works better for them than another. (Me Advil better than Tylenol) Allergies you may not know about. Of course Medications they are on and Medications that have not worked or have a sensitivity to. I knew every operation my Mom and Dad had, bet my brothers didn't.
I remember the Activities Director as me about Moms interests. Actually, she had been an advid reader but Dementia stopped that. She did not do puzzles, play cards or games. She was not crafty. Her days had been taking care of my Dad, cooking, baking and reading over TV. But I knew this but I doubt my brothers or SILs didn't.
Yes, we do need a list.
A notebook (3 ring binder)of resources for a neighbor came in handy, that is where I put any information that others needed to know.
Turns out she had way too many doctors that did not know about the others. (21 doctors).
The information from her prescription bottles were a good source of intel.
Your example of OTC medication preferences is good. If someone were taking care of me, and I broke out itching or welts, (daily), they might try cortisone cream, call the doctor, get an Rx cream for itching. When all I would need is my tube of Benadryl Cream. And my laundry washed with fragrance free detergent, no fabric softener, using dryer balls instead. etc. etc. etc.
But when it came to my parent's prior health, they had been very tight lipped about everything for all of their years. Nothing was ever shared. In fact, my Mom's family was also like that.
When my parents retired to my area, and years had passed and now it was time for me to drive my parents to appointments, it was an eye opener. I remember one doctor asking me how is my Mom doing with her bladder cancer. I looked at him like his hair was on fire. He knew by my look that my Mom never shared that info with me.... [sigh].
Come to think of it, I doubt my partner even know much about my likes and dislikes. He's just not tuned into those things. If I wrote it on a football helmet he may remember it.
Pmruns, I bet no one knows I like my bed next to the window on the southeast side of the house. The bedding with no scented soap and no scented dyer sheet.
Did the list work, no. Once I was told that a Neurologist was being brought in to consult on Mom. I asked who and it was not the one listed on the paperwork and I said that. Told the nurse I gave a list to the desk nurse of all Moms meds and doctors. Her doctor had privledges there so why would you call someone else. 3 out of 5 of her doctors had privleges there. Same with food. She was put on soft foods. I was told she didn't eat breakfast. I asked what was it. Scrambled eggs. Mom does not like eggs.
I am going to put an additional tab with these suggestions onto my medical spreadsheet.
Both of my daughters and husband have access to this Google Doc.