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Yes, I wish posters would reply. Sometimes we don't know ifvwe are on the right track or not. It would be nice if when they join the must do a profile.

I just want to know if the OP took our suggestion and what was found out. If this is a new scam out there, facilities need to be made aware. They need to protect their residents and their families.
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Firstly ask the facility Manager who gave this person access to go in and harass your mother - sounds unfortunately like there could be some collusion going on here. Tell them he is banned from access to your mother again or you will be calling the police in to investigate and seeing how many other residents have historically received visits from the same person.
Secondly get all his details, licence number, name, company, and report him to the licencing authority.

Good luck - too many scams and scammers in the world today preying on the elderly.
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Get his name, license number & who he works for & file a complaint with State...also ask @NH who allowed him to talk to your mother? Tell them only these people allowed to visit: (their names)
It is taking advantage of someone who is not able to make decisions anymore! It’s a financial crime averted
HUGS 🤗
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If this situation occurred in the US, report the real estate person to the state licensing board. In Texas, it's the Texas Real Estate Commission (TREC). The licensing board can censure the salesperson, up to and including, revoking his/her real estate license.
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I think the writer of the original post has left the building. It's been 4 days and no replies..... [sigh].

We really do need his/her clarifications.
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As others have written, please please pls make sure that what your mom has told you is accurate.

if you are positive that it is & there is another person who heard the conversation, here’s my suggestion.... I’d contact the Realtor. (If your in a 1 party state, I’d record it on my iPhone as well.) I’d ask her what the market is like in your neighborhood and if she knows of a Realtor who does listings in your specific area. You do NOT say you are interested in selling the house, it’s only asking if she knows a Realtor in your zip or ‘hood. If she’s actually did approach your mom to get it listed, she will 99.9% tell you that she spoke with mom, what a lovely lady she is, your neighborhood is in demand, the market is hot, yada, yada. That’s when you tell her, “well so you did speak with mom, correct? I thought so, you need to know that any further communication with mom will be considered your attempting to take advantage of a vulnerable adult” and you will follow up this conversation with a certified letter to the Real Estate firm that holds her license (like KellerWilliams or Sotheby’s) & the State Board of Realtors. And do it. Stuff like this does happen, & if it did happen you imho got to go for the nut cut. Otherwise they will continue to prey on our elders.
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I am also curious HOW this realtor is getting access to the Facility when family cannot even get in to see their loved ones?
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I definitely agree that the realtor should be permitted to visit your Mother. However the realtor may be visiting their relatives and Mum may be got in the conversation. More importantly it’s time you check how your Mother’s house will transfer on death.
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Ricky6 Apr 2021
I meant to say that the realtor should NOT be permitted to visit your Mother.
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Tell NH this person is not allowed to visit your mother. Also call the real estate board for your state and report this person. This person could possibly obtain a signature on a document from a person with dementia - way out of bounds!
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I don't know what state you are in, but I find it disturbing that ANYONE can walk into a NH to visit someone during this pandemic. ESP not a NH! I wasn't even allowed to visit my own mother in a MC facility - dangerous enough for those facilities, but NHs are among the worst hit!

You haven't indicated any cognitive issues with your mother. If there are, all the more reason to make these "visits" stop.

I would be having a chat with the administration of the NH to find out how this person is getting access to the building, never mind your mother. You say NH here, but the profile says AL. Even if it is AL, they should also have some kind of lockdown protocol in place. Family visiting, within reason, but random visitors should be a huge NO NO!

I would also, if possible, contact her/her agency by certified mail demanding these "visits" stop. Has she left a business card? Do you know her info? If this doesn't stop it, I'd find an attorney who could direct them to stay away, even if you have to spend some money to get a court order.

As noted in a reply to someone else, I got notices in the mail for both my previous home and mom's condo. The home was mostly the flip-fishers, offering cash as-is (the house had already been sold before these started arriving! shows how dumb most of them are.) The condo was usually mail from a realtor in the area the condo was located. I just tossed it all, after laughing at the flippers...
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The National Association of Realtors has an ethics publication. It might be worth downloading and perusing.
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disgustedtoo Apr 2021
If I had insomnia, perhaps I would "peruse" these documents, but who needs to read that to understand what this person is doing is totally unethical? I have received mailings from "flippers" for my house and realtors for mom's condo, but that's it. No calls. No personal visits. Even before we moved mom to MC, I had changed her billing address to my PO box so I could manage her finances. I get SO much junk mail in her name! I really love the ones regarding getting extended coverage on the car - no mention of the car itself, as they don't have a clue, but it is amusing because the car was spirited away well before we needed to move her!

What isn't amusing is how many gullible people fall for these scams and others, including the phone calls, some threatening, which are becoming more common again...

For original Star Trek fans, wouldn't it be nice to have a Tantalus Device App for our phones? For those who don't know, in an alternate universe, Captain has this device, and when the image on the display is one's enemy, the push of a button would cause the person to cease to exist. Doesn't kill them, they just never were. I haven't added any Apps to my phone, but I WOULD pay for this one! All those scam calls... POOF!
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That is very aggressive for a realtor and possibly criminal - especially if your mom has dementia. I suggest you contact the realtor and explain the situation - that you live in the home, that you are not interested in selling, and if he/she bothers mom again - place a restraining order against him. You may also wish to notify her NH since they probably rules against this type of behavior as well.
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If you know who the Realtor is, contact their broker by mail (leave a paper trail), and tell them that one of their Realtors is overstepping their boundaries with an at-risk senior.
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Regarding the post office, the Postal Service does not keep a database of residential or business customers, and does not sell address lists. Instead, there are companies that collect and sell information about consumers and businesses. You can buy or rent a mailing list from those companies.

As for addresses on-line through dozen of such "find an address or find a person" websites I've been down that path for my family trees. There are so many mistakes it is head spinning. One such site shows my Mom now being 104 and living with my since passed Dad in their house. I think not. They both passed a few years ago.

Quite a few of the above sites shows that my ex-hubby, his wife and their now grown daughter live here with me. Yeah right :)
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disgustedtoo Mar 2021
Data mining is BIG business! Wrong doesn't even begin to describe some of the "data." Selling mailing lists has been a "thing" for a long long time. My ex put his name on a list once, adding III to it. When mailings showed up addressed to him as the III, we knew where it originated! Now, with computers and the internet, it is even worse.

I suspect it just all gets collected from here there and everywhere and no one takes the time to verify anything. The PO itself won't give out addresses, however if there is a forwarding address, sometimes mail is returned to sender with a yellow strip indicating the new address (working on mailing lists for the cat shelter, I was able to partially verify most of these address changes using google on my phone.) Additionally, every place you do business with has your address. Most, if not all, will gladly sell those addresses for a few bucks! Think about how many accounts just the average person would have: electric, phone, gas/oil, bank, mtg company and every other account you have, including credit cards. I don't care what their "privacy" notices say - they all sell lists.

Imagine my surprise getting mail from a dentist office and an insurance company, both looking to draw in new business, addressed to my ex. We divorced almost FORTY years ago. I moved here about 6 months before he died in an accident. He NEVER lived in this house or anywhere near it! I moved and he died SIX years ago. Yet I am getting mail with his name on it. I've gotten some insurance mail addressed to my son as well. He also has never lived here!

Doing lookup about this data collection stuff for another posting, I noted that these make "associations" with others. Without going to the detail link ($$), whitepages shows all 3 of his wives' names and our daughter's name. So, they can look us up and get that address. I generally just rip them up and toss them. It is sad that businesses pay good money for these "lists" and more often than not the information is useless!

Even sadder are those who aren't as savvy who get taken in by the junk mail and the scam calls. The calls had died down some, but they seem to be ramping up again. I don't answer ANY of them (easy to ID most - not in my contact list? nope. also I didn't change my number after crossing state lines - shhhh, they haven't figured that out yet!!!)

I've also gotten numerous mailings from "fixer-uppers" who wanted to buy my previous house for cash... months and years after it was SOLD. All they need to do before mailing is check Zillow. It isn't always correct, but it clearly showed the house was under contract AND then sold! If these people are that stupid, they shouldn't be trying to flip houses (maybe they are just scam artists.) Thanks to stupidity of a person in the EC atty office, I froze all my credit years ago. I still have to monitor all my accounts, but they can't use my credit to do jack!!

I also recall getting mail from some realtors in the area where my mother's condo was. I had used forwarding to get all her bills sent here so I could change the mailing address. I'm sure my mother will also reach 104 "living" with me as well (hint, she never lived in my house and has passed, but I still get mail in her name - hasn't been long enough, but I expect it to continue. As noted above, no one checks enough to confirm whether the person is alive or lives at the address.)
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I would most certainly speak to the management at the nursing home to verify that a realtor actually came on their premises and spoke to your mother. Then ask to see their check-in record. Visitors at a nursing home must sign in at the front desk and write down the resident they're visiting or they don't come in. Look at the sign-in sheets for the time this incident supposedly occurred, then connect the dots. You'll find a name if there's one to find.
If it's true that a realtor came to speak to your mom in the NH about selling her house, it was easy enough for them to find her location.
These people look at home ownership records (which are public) at city hall for certain areas of town they're interested to buy in.
They check out how long someone has owned the property. That's how they get a ballpark age on the person who owns it.
If someone's name has been on a deed for 40 or 50 years they assume that person is elderly. If there was a spouse and the property passed into survivorship to the other, that's a good indicator too.
Then they check out the property to see if anyone is living there. If they deduce that no one is, the logical conclusion is that they're either dead or in a nursing home. So they check out the post office to find a mailing address or they do it online. NH residents get mail. That's how they find an address for a person.
Nursing homes and assisted living facilities don't allow solicitation. Marketing representatives are not allowed to market to their residents to sell them things or try to get them into contract of some kind. Once an elderly person goes through the door of a nursing home, the nursing home is the only one working a scam and ripping them off. They prevent anyone else from trying to.
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GardenArtist Mar 2021
Good point about checking the post office.  I was shocked how many have done that, not just the wannabe flippers but charities as well.    And it only took them a month or so to start sending their solicitations to my house instead of my father's.

When I questioned someone (at the post office, I think) about this, I learned that the post office does in fact release information on address changes, which would be good if it was consistent.    I still get solicitations, but the post office didn't provide a forwarding address for Dad's friends, and only one Christmas card made it to me the first year that he died.  But the junk mail got through.

Dad was in rehab several times at a facility that had a receptionist, so I initially thought there was at least that minimum level of security.   Then I learned, as other family visitors did, that there was a side entrance, visible from the parking lot, where entrance could be gained just by pushing a button which automatically opened the door.

The last rehab, then palliative care facility was much better.    I couldn't even get through the exterior vestibule w/o pressing the button.  The receptionist responded and opened the door.   And there was a sign-in book, although someone easily could have gotten in without signing, or just made up a name to sign in.

Better yet, I saw 7 video cameras monitoring the complex, as well as a security vehicle regularly driving around.
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So, how do you know that a Realtor talked to mom?

Is it mom who told you this? Have you verified that?
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Deemartin, I am scratching my head on how a Realtor even was able to visit your Mom due to the pandemic ???

And wondering how a Realtor would even know that your Mom lived at a nursing home, there is no record base a Realtor can use to search for such information. I assume your Mom's real estate tax bill comes to her home, not to the nursing home.

If a Realtor did visit your Mom, he/she would have left a business card with their name, real estate company name, phone number, website, etc. If your Mom can produce the business card, then call the local Real Estate Board of Realtors and file a complaint.

May I ask why your Mom is now living in a nursing home? Does she have memory issues? Maybe there was no Realtor, or she overhead a conversation from someone else.
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Isthisrealyreal Mar 2021
Would they leave a business card if they were actually trolling NHs to buy property?
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If she is competent she is able to decide if she wishes to sell the home or does not wish to sell the home. If she sells the home it should be made clear to her that she will have those assets in her name and would not be eligible for medicaid until that money is spent down. She may do better, unless she has sufficient funds for her care, to allow you to stay in the home as caretaker and perhaps pay taxes and utilities on the home.
However, be clear in your own mind. As long as your Mom is competent she is able to make her own decisions.
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This is straying off topic, but I'd like to share it anyways.  After getting fed up with flipper calls, I began playing games with them.  I gave them a list of information they had to provide before I'd consider them.  I didn't ask, I demanded:

1.    D&B report on their company and any involved in their actions.  Most of them probably don't even know what a Dun & Bradstreet report is.   I offer the alternative of audited financial reports for the last 5 years.

2.    Copy of Articles of Incorporation, Assumed Name Certificate, or LLC and Member Agreements, Certificates of Good Standing.

3.   List of ALL transactions, purchases, acquisitions, flips and sales for the last 5 years, including address, purchase price, amount invested for fix-up and final sale.

4.   Criminal checks and backgrounds for each member of the flipper team, including the advance scouts, plus misdemeanor and/or felony charges if brought against any of their team for actions arising from flipping activities.

Also, disclosure of any criminal activities (obviously they're not going to admit to this, but I just want to let them know they're under a microscope.)

5.   Information on how much of their profit is decreased by discharge of existing liens, specifically mortgages, and the entities holding the liens.  This is to prod them into revealing whether or not they even pay off existing liens.  

6.    Source for locating house in question, and their specific interest in this property.

7.     Number of houses for which they’ve sent solicitations this year (2021).  I've rarely received any solicitation that's stamped; they're almost all postage prepaid which to me suggests mass mailings.

8.     Real estate credentials, including real estate firms for which principals have worked, titles, responsibilities, number of properties purchased.   Their prime argument seems to be a no fuss, no muss transaction, no closing costs, etc.   I doubt they even know how to pro-rate taxes. 

9.     Their status in any affiliated flipper organizations, including their “cut” of the profits.

10.     Business office (not the scout's  home address).

11.     Real estate credentials, including real estate firms for which principals have worked, titles, responsibilities, number of properties purchased; this could confirm they have no real estate background at all.

12.    Insurance coverage, including certificate of insurance from liability carrier; statement of claims against insurance for last five years.

There are more demands, but usually the D&B stops them as they have no idea what it is.
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TekkieChikk Mar 2021
Genius!
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You need to tell Administration about this and ask that no one is to talk to ur Mom without u being notified. Give them a list of people allowed to visit.

I would also call the realtor in question and tell them to stop visiting Mom. If she has Dementia tell them she is not competent to sell her house. And, you r living there. I would also wonder how they knew to contact Mom.

Please come back and tell us how this works out. As Geaton said, this is the second time this has been mentioned on the forum.
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GardenArtist Mar 2021
JoAnn, good suggestions.  I'm wondering though if it wouldn't present a stronger front for the OP to advise them in writing, or hire an attorney to do so,  so that she has proof they've been notified.   

I'd also be concerned about revealing the dementia DX as they could conceivably, if they're aggressive and dishonest enough, leverage that information to their benefit.

I would certainly agree that finding out the source of their information is important.
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This is very disturbing.  

Geaton777, I'm not familiar with any service that protects title in property.   You're not thinking of a title policy, are you?   If not, could you elaborate?    ( do have Norton Lifelock but I'm not sure if Norton is really doing anything other than pushing its product aggressively.)


DeeMartin, the more I think about this situation, the more annoyed I become.   Besides the other poster who shared a similar story (which I questioned as he seemed to be a bit confused about the issues), I myself received 9 solicitations for  my father's house in 2 months this year.   In 2020 I received probably around a dozen.    None of them qualified for consideration; I wouldn't even hire them to take out the trash.

I certainly would share your concern and anger.    And I would advise the NH staff so that if it's not already in place, guests can be screened to weed out commercial ones.    The receptionist could also ask for business cards, name and room number of the specific person intended to be visited (to check with a "no soliciting" policy which hopefully the staff will implement after you speak with them).   I would also ask for a referral, i.e., who referred them to the person they plan to visit?  How they're learning about your mother's placement is a serious issue.

I do know after forcing some of them to be more forthright that to find potential homes to flip, they:

1.    Go through deed records at the local county courthouse, but they wouldn't reveal if they specifically look for real estate titled in a Trust, or what their criteria are.

2.    Sometimes drive up and down streets in specific neighborhoods, scouting for properties that don't appear to be occupied.

I do recall that AARP has addressed this problem.  When I searched on AARP and flipper tactics, I was surprised that the Google hits were mostly in favor of how to be a flipper!    No surprise there though.

I did some quick searches of the AARP website but didn't locate the article.   If you want to call them, the number is:   866.654.5572.  

There are legitimate realtors who have clients looking for "investments", but these aren't the flippers who send out postcards.   

I've asked FreqFlyer to opine; she has a background in real estate and can offer insights on how to deal with these people, but if they're not truly real estate pros, and just flippers, I'm not sure if they fall within the jurisdiction of real estate entities.

Since you live there, you could put up "no soliciting" signs.    (I have one on my front door that advises no soliciting from anyone, including but not limited to political, religious, construction, siding, lawn care, pizza or any other solicitors.)  It's worked for years.  

There's another possibility with this so-called realtor:   he's casing the place to see what he could steal, and probably very easily.  

Does the NH have video surveillance of all entry points?   If not, it should.

I hope you let us know how this works out.    There's no excuse for harrassing someone in a care facility about house sales.


Something else I learned about flippers:   some are affiliated with out of state entities.  I check the postage paid information and found that some companies are in CA, FL, or other states.    So apparently these are nationwide outfits, and the locals are the scouts.  I did speak with one woman who was in a talkative mood and she confirmed that she calls people identified by the scouts, as a sort of "first cut" to find out as much as she can.
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Geaton777 Mar 2021
Here is a good description of deed theft and how to prevent it:

https://www.sbnonline.com/article/the-myth-of-title-theft-what-providers-of-protection-against-it-arent-telling-you/

In reading more about this, the deed thieves aren't going to show up anywhere in person if at all possible. This type of crime involves forgery on the title, then the thieves selling the property to an unsuspecting buyer. The original homeowner is left having to prove the house is theirs and clearing the title.

In the OP's case the realtor is an opportunist but I don't think what they're doing is illegal. If the OP's mother doesn't have a diagnosis of cognitive incapacity in her medical records then she is perfectly able to sell her duplex without the permission or knowledge of her children who live in the property.
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I would make sure the admin knows about this lurker. They need to post No Solicitor signs or something, and if not on their front door, then you should on the door to your mom's room. You can purchase a service that protects titles and deeds from predatory activity, and also services like LifeLock to protect from identity fraud. I recently read on this forum about someone who was visited in the hospital by a realtor and he eventually had a lien put on their home, and lost it. I wasn't sure of the veracity of this story, but now here is another incident, so maybe it's becoming a thing.
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Have your lawyer send the realtor a cease and desist letter.
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lealonnie1 Mar 2021
Short & sweet, love it!
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Do you have POA?

Is there dementia involved? If so, your mom can't enter into a contract.

Can you tell the front desk to keep this opportunist out of there?
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