Recently I've noticed that my Dad is talking to himself a lot. I can't make out exactly what he is saying because he only ever does this when I am out of the room, so I get the odd word here and there, but it sounds like he is having a conversation with someone who isn't there that can last a few minutes at a time. I lost my mum a couple of years ago, and I know that he is really struggling and suffering with depression. I've tried to encourage him to seek help with this, but he is completely against anything like that, as he feels that any counselling wouldn't help him. I'm wondering if the "conversations" he is having are with my mum, and whether this is quite a normal part of the grieving process that some people experience. It seems to be happening on a more regular basis now and as time moves on he seems to be getting worse not better and I'm just a little bit concerned about it. If anyone has any experience with this or any advice it would be greatly appreciated :)
I talk to myself and the TV quite a bit. Sometimes I even talk to myself when I'm shopping. People probably just figure I have bluetooth. These days its not unusual to see people talking to "themselves" in stores. It was kind of shocking the first few times I saw it. Now I just think bluetooth and go about my way.
I've always talked to myself silently. I find that now I am doing it aloud, especially when I am home alone. But I do it in the car, and occasionally in the store. I am not talking to my deceased husband or anybody else. I am literally talking to myself. "Oh dear. Now you'll have to do this over. Argh!! Dumb computer! I should have listened about backing it up!" And sometimes I answer myself. "Why didn't I get this started yesterday?" "Because you didn't have any extra time yesterday, either!"
I am about as mentally healthy as most people, healthier than some. I don't know if I'm really weird or there are millions like me, talking to ourselves when we are alone.
It wouldn't hurt for Dad to have a thorough physical, but if it were my dad, I'd just smile and say, "So he does it too!"
A visit to the doctor is a good idea as depression is likely a part of this, but be aware that medication for depression is tricky and can be even more so with the elderly.
You may want to tell your dad that you'd appreciate it if he would get his physical it's been awhile. Don't mention the fact that he seems to be having conversations with himself or your mom. Once an appointment has been made, write the doctor a note letting him or her know about this issue. The doctor can feel out your dad to see if there seems to be a need for intervention or if he should be left alone with his own method of "therapy."
Please update us. My heart is aching for your dad and for you.
Carol