I know a woman that I am casual friends with. She really drives me crazy though for a variety of reasons. We all know people like that. Anyway, I have a sneaky suspicion that she is lying to me about having cancer. She is the type that has to be the center of attention and doesn't like that my mom has been a priority for me and tries to compete!
I have caught her in lies before and overlooked it thinking it was maybe a mistake or an accident. She says she has cancer and is doing chemo. She has absolutely no hair loss, goes out immediately after saying that she has had chemo. Everyone I know that has had chemo has had horrible side effects. Has chemo changed to where the effects are not as bad? She hasn't specifically said the type of cancer, she just said it's her stomach. I'm starting to think she made it up for attention or possibly even has mental illness because she has been saying very strange things. She recently asked me if I ever saw my soul leave my body? Okay, that is just too out there! She tells me that she saw her soul leave her body, so I said to her, like in a NDE, and she said no, she was not dreaming, nor dying, and her soul was a mist type substance and went across the room and out of the front door. I didn't even know how to respond. Then she said she was born with a veil over her face and could tell the future. I'm wondering if I should tell someone in her family about the crazy things she has said lately. She is almost 80 years old.
2. This woman is telling you that she saw her soul leaving her own body and that she can tell the future because she was born with a caul,* and you're suspicious about her mental health because you think she may be exaggerating or even fabricating what she says about her cancer? Two possibilities immediately suggest themselves: a) she is a mad as a hatter; or b) she does have cancer and the treatment is causing these psychiatric symptoms. Either way, should you really be either judging or meddling?
I don't think you should tell tales to her family, no. But as a concerned neighbour and citizen, it would be fine to ask if all is well and if the lady has good support because you have noticed she doesn't seem quite herself.
*This is actually quite a widespread superstition, though I've heard only that it's good luck.
("Chemo brain" is a well documented side effect of some cancer treatments, there is also the very real possibility of tumours metastasizing to the brain.)
No! There are a few different Chemotherapy that are used to treat different cancers and the dose of the chemo makes all the difference in the world. My mother had two different kinds of cancer; one was thyroid and the other was pancreas she did not lose her hair on her head, but she did lose hair on her legs and armpits which she was very happy she didn't have to shave anymore. The bottom line, it really matters what the cancers is, how long chemo treatment is and what the dosage is.
I would tell her family you have seen some changes. It could be Dementia or something physical. Like a UTI. She should see a dr. for a good exam.
If you are taking mom for a quick lil walk around facility, and lady is up to it, invite her to go with you and mom. Don't let her stories phase you. Don't encourage either,if they bother you.
I finally had to do something similar to this gentleman in our facility. I quickly pop my head in, wave hello, and then walk over to see my aunt. He's a nice man,
Personal example. My Mum belongs to a service club and has know the same group of people for over 50 years. I am friends with the daughter of one of the other couples. Mum and a couple other members noticed that Mrs H's behaviour was odd and not consistent and Mr H was acting guarded. Mum brought up her concerns with me and I approached my friend her daughter.
It was not an easy conversation topic to bring up, so I cut to the chase. Turns out daughter knew her Mum has early dementia, but her parents had decided to 'hide' it, not realizing that you cannot hide in front of people who have known you for 50+ years. Now that it is out in the open the H's have a community of support.
Thanks for your perspective. It helps.
All Chemo acts differently on different people, and there is a lot that they can do these days to limit the side effects too!
Chemo Brain is Real though, and her crazy thoughts may be a side effect, for sure! I would definately speak with her family about what she is saying!