Follow
Share

My mother died from what was probably stroke-induced dementia in 2019. She was a zombie for about two years. My father has short-term memory loss that will inevitably worsen. I have a disorder that can lead to dementia and have been on medication that studies show can cause dementia. I have no children and my husband is 7 years older than I. As for my siblings, I wouldn't trust any of them near me. I don't want to end up destroyed by dementia with no one to care for me properly. While assisted suicide is available in a number of states, the rules are a cruel slap in the face to those who face dementia. You have to be considered competent when you make the decision but you must make the decision if you have only six months to live. This is nice for a lot of diseases but doesn't really work for dementia. I've found a few organizations in Switzerland and the Netherlands that allow a mentally competent person to obtain assisted suicide at any time. You have to jump through a lot of hoops and it costs a lot, but it's something to think about. If my husband goes before I do, I think that is what I'll do.

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Find Care & Housing
Yes I think about it everyday. I take care of my dad, married but no kids by choice except a fur kid, husband is younger but poor health and I truly do not want to live once I get to the point I need to be taken care of.

Per responses to your question here we are not alone and someone mentioned quality of life I agree what quality of life is there when you are bed ridden having to be fed, bathed and changed? I do not want for me this “quality of life”
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

This is a very complicated issue since you need to be competent to receive assisted suicide services. Also, people who swore they would do it, cling to life at the end. Suppose you simply can’t remember your plan? Nobody in your family can help or they will be charged with murder. If you are in a facility, they must give you your medications. If you are at home, you could tell your family you want hospice and they can withhold life supporting medication. Watch the movie, One True Thing with Meryl Streep.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

It seems that you have all the answers already. Good luck.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Yes, I have thought about it. Getting dementia and ending up like my mom scares the hell out of me. I don't want to burden my daughter with managing my care. I don't want her to dread having to come see me when she is tired and has fifty other things to do. I don't want her to hold her breath to see if I remember who she is. I don't want her stressing about how to pay for my care. I don't want friends of mine showing up and seeing me not in control of my faculties.

There are worse things than death and dementia is one of them....
Helpful Answer (6)
Report

Oh yes, I am absolutely terrified of getting alzheimers or dementia when I am older. My only consolation is that I am not even 40 yet so chances are it is a very long way off.

After seeing what alzheimers did to my mother I am absolutely terrified of it. I think out of any terminal illness it is by far the one I least want. But unfortunately for me, the most likely I will get.

Modern medical science has evolved to the point where we can now keep people alive for a long time, much too long, and there seems to have been so little emphasis on quality of life, just fact of life. In this quest to do anything we can to keep people alive it is like a form of torture spanning years. I absolutely cannot fathom the thought of this for myself.

I am really hoping the law and science around euthanasia develops significantly in the next 20 or so years to allow people to die with dignity.
Helpful Answer (7)
Report

The people who are still here with dementia, double incontient, immobile and so forth are increasingly still here because Medicare paid for repeated treatments, often to the tune of hundreds of thousands or a million apiece, to save their life until they get to the above point. This will only increase with the boomers, so I suggest a choice that every eligible Medicare recipient should be entitled to make.

Which is that you can have 2 million worth of government paid whatever through your lifespan. If you didn’t pursue these very expensive treatments and end up double incontinent and or with dementia, it is only fair that Medicare should pay for you as versus someone who elected to take every treatment available.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Addressing this to anyone: 💖

The last two years of pandemic have been tragic and heartbreaking.
It was enough to think about.

It is time to attempt to come out the other side, get your thoughts and lives in order. Start to function better, as best you can. (This statement is called tough love).

Thinking of suicide is a common human condition.
However, no one will be doing well entertaining those thoughts.
I say pass on that kind of thinking, put it aside. If you must, speak to a psychiatrist about your thoughts. But decide you will not act on it.

If you want to get through this time, give up any interest or obsessions or curiosity about the dark side of life. Choose life, so that you might live, and live abundantly.

Yes, I am not unaware you have rights. You also have the right to live.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report
reallyfedup May 2022
I appreciate your words. I do not plan to commit assisted suicide right now. I would never do that while my husband was alive. However, I have two reasons to consider it. One is that there is an excellent chance that I will eventually
develop some kind of dementia. Should I sense the beginning of dementia and my husband is gone, I will seek assisted suicide. The other reason is that I have suffered for more than 50 years from a complex mood disorder. I have pursued treatment for almost the entire time and never found relief. I just today spoke with a bipolar disorder clinic psychiatrist who is going to send an assessment in a week. But the clinic does not offer the newer treatments, so I'm afraid I'll be back to the same drugs that haven't worked well in the past, many of which have unacceptable side effects. So, I'm working on trying to make it better and we'll see. It's not that I want to commit suicide, it's that I'm very tired.
(4)
Report
I read several of the replys to this quandry.

I, too, am not suicidal. But when realize that I am going to need help to live, I plan to exit. My husband and I both have decided this. I even dreamed one night that I was having a funeral. I was alive and basically, it was a party for me to say goodbye. I think that's a wonderful way to go.

My mother has wanted to go to sleep and not wake up for more than 5 years. Today she is in a wheelchair, losing her memories, and living in Assisted Living. I go to see her and most of the time she is sitting in her chair in her room alone and asleep. Breaks my heart to think she's doing this for hours every day. Fortunately, she is in a good facility and they bring her out of her room regularly.
Helpful Answer (8)
Report

Hi,I don't have any kids either. My mom has always been my best friend in the whole world. She has Alzheimer's and I take care of her and it is emotionally killing me. I don't have any body that would take care of me either. I'm gonna stay around to take care of her but when something happens to her, I can't stand the thought of living with out my MoMA, so I'm going to commit suicide then
Helpful Answer (3)
Report
PeggySue2020 Apr 2022
if you are seriously thinking of killing yourself when your senior dies, you need help or to be helped out of the caregiving situation. It is normal for the elders to die first.
(0)
Report
See 5 more replies
Yes, I have thought about this a great deal. Do not want to subject my kids and husband to the Awfulness. Hard part is that you’d have to take your life while still being lucid and having quality of life, and it would be hard to leave my family in that state of mind.

We had to peacefully euthanize our family dog last year, and I think all the time about how we afforded him that mercy but can’t stop the suffering of humans in our life who are begging for an end to their sheer misery.

Euthanasia/suicide are obviously so complex as issues.
as an issue.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

reallyfedup: Do NOT do this to your loved ones. Seek help posthaste. Think of it this way - you would be gone and they will be left with tremendous upset, to say the least.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Yes indeedy! But I think for me, when Mike dies, [he is seven years older than me,]
I will just stop with all the pills I have to take, especially heart and blood pressure,
and wait for nature to take it's course. My daughter states that it is the cowards way out but I don't think she has a clue. I wish she would come up and visit Mike and see all the zombies [poor frightened things!] that are in the Home. She would
perhaps re-think her opinions on this matter.
I died once in the hospital for two minutes and glory be, did I have an experience but we won't go into that because I am already called crazy by the people of this building I live in! I told one lady I trusted and she shared it with everyone else and they are low IQ'd and nasty. I keep things to myself now. I am moving this weekend just to get away from the building. The Home isn't the only place where people are childish when older. Believe me!
My two cents worth.
Temper. :}
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

As Patton said in the movie: every damn day!
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Absolutely! My Mom has wanted to die for the last 2 years, however, her body is not frail enough. She has arthritis in her lower back that makes it hurt to sit down for long periods of time and lie down for long periods of time. However, that same arthritis makes it difficult to walk. What do I mean long? 5-10 minutes. With meds and dementia, she sleeps on the average of 45 minutes per time, before either pain or the urge to go to the bathroom, wakes her up. She has gained the ability to have completely lucid conversations, eat, walk, etc. all while being asleep. It took us a year to realize that she did this....however...I digress....

My Mom does not have a condition that would allow assisted suicide, even if she didn't have dementia. Just being old and wanting to die is not a reason for assisted suicide.

I've seriously re-thought about the "good to live long" concept.

Regarding starvation as a way to die, my ex-mother-in-law attempted that. All she wanted to do was to die in her own house. Her kids were gone, she had done everything she wanted to do in her life, her siblings passed away, her spouse passed away decades earlier, she couldn't relate to the people who had moved into the neighborhood, plus she was now on a street that had traffic. The problem is that when she starved herself, she lost the ability to control her muscles, which meant that someone found her on the floor with urine. After being in the hospital, she was deemed to not be able to live by herself, therefore, she never returned home, and died in a nursing home(?) 5 years later. Starvation isn't for the faint of heart.

Sometimes I think that dying of a heart attack might be a good thing....

....and no, I am not suicidal....
Helpful Answer (6)
Report
SusanHeart Jun 2022
Chopper I do not know where you are but there are DRs who can assist your mom with the back pain. It is called Pain management. Do some research and talk to them, you will be surprised. My dad has really low pain tolerance and have arthritis, scoliosis and disc compression and the shots helped him tremendously.

Best of luck to you both, there is hope, please do not give up, the 1 little thing that they say and forget about it 3 seconds later that makes you laugh, that unexpected action that warms you heart makes things worth it.

I will be sending you thought of strength.
(0)
Report
See 1 more reply
Hi Fedup,

I am also concerned about my own possible end of life, as my mother died from dementia and both my sisters have Alzheimer’s. I’ve care for them all and I don’t envision that for myself. I volunteer with End of Life Washington and have assisted 30 or more people using Death with Dignity, otherwise known as medical aid in dying. It is fast and peaceful and the body does not blow up, as one person below indicated. However, it is not available for Alzheimer’s and dementia patients. There are two other options. VSED or Voluntarily Stopping Eating and Drinking is one way. It takes about two weeks and requires caregivers and a death doula is recommended. One drawback is that the required care for two weeks is expensive and usually out of pocket. See VSEDResources.com for more info.
Another option is Final Exit Network. Both are legal and can get the job done.
I’m only providing information and not making recommendations. But, I am passionate about both my roles of caregiving and helping people die. Feel free to reach out if you want to talk more or just visit Endoflifewashington.org to see what kind of advanced planning options there are.
Helpful Answer (9)
Report

Gee, I thought I was the only Boomer looking for an easy way out if and when a terminal disease is diagnosed, but here we all are.

We've been taking about all the many ways to avoid languishing in pain or loss of, when the end is in sight. Hospice does offer morphine and other drugs to minimize these issues. "Death with Dignity" is a very important alternative so that friends and family are not the ones left behind with the sight of a deceased loved one. I believe the body blows up and smells horrific; that is not how I want to be remembered, nor do I want to be responsible for someone else's PTSD.

Personally, I would prefer to take Fentanyl; from what I've seen, it's quick and easy. So many unsuspecting addicts take it for a joy ride, but if it can be used medically to induce a smooth ride to the Pearly Gates, why not? We've put too many precious pets down for the sake of mercy, why don't we deserve the same love and respect for a life well lived?
Helpful Answer (6)
Report
Labs4me Apr 2022
I would reconsider Fentanyl. My son died from an overdose of this drug and it was not a smooth ride.
(3)
Report
See 1 more reply
I have to say that anyone considering a bullet a good option, should really take a long drive into the wilderness. Because doing this in your home is as effed up as it gets. It is life long trauma for whomever finds your mess.

Do it where nobody but wild animals will have to see your carcass.
Helpful Answer (9)
Report
Tothill Apr 2022
Back in the 1980’s when BC had a prolonged recession a neighbour took his life in the bathroom of their home on his son’s 8th birthday. He used a gun.

It was horrific for the family, for the boy and for our entire neighbourhood. We all heard the shot.
(2)
Report
Most people have considered the situation you have described in the abstract, not really thinking they will ever have to consider it in reality. In the situation you describe, I feel it is a personal choice, a choice that no one else should judge, and no one else or entity - government, etc - should interfere with. As far as bringing religion into it, that is up to you, too. No one should judge you or influence you using their own brand of beliefs. Everyone feels their own brand of religion is the "true one". That fact that you are asking may indicate that you want approval. However, this is a personal decision and you do not need anyone's approval. Whatever you choose, it seems you will have to plan for it now while you are in full command of your faculties. Whether it is to plan and finance assisted suicide or to plan and finance your care when you are no longer able to care for yourself.
Helpful Answer (6)
Report

I don’t recommend assisted suicide. I recommend prayers and strength of God for the process. We do not know if worst is waiting at the other side. Jesus spoke about the afterlife
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Yes. There are states that allow it, I think Washington State does. You made need to establish residency there for a certain amount of time and get a physician to document that this is your wishes before you hit that stage of dementia.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report
PeggySue2020 Apr 2022
The whole west coast allows it, and it’s basically a handful of barbiturates, but you can’t get them for that diagnosis. Hastings Center talked about the ethics of having an implantable death bomb put into people so that five years hence, they would expire. You can imagine how that idea bombed.

For me, I’d do either a Tijuana trip for animal euthanasia drugs, which are also barbiturates. Or I’d get on hospice and horde however much morphine and Ativan as possible and keep asking for more so I could have a stash.
(7)
Report
See 2 more replies
My plan is to wait till my fur babies pass because I can't leave them alone, then simply stop eating and drinking. No mess, no fuss.
I'll leave a note for family. I never want to be a burden to them.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report
reallyfedup Apr 2022
I was thinking that too but don't you need some hefty medicine to get through that?
(0)
Report
I am in Canada, we have had MAiD for a while.

https://www.canada.ca/en/health-canada/services/medical-assistance-dying.html#b11

People can now make a statement that they want MAiD while of sound mind, even if they suffer from dementia in the future.

My Godmother chose MaiD, my uncle is considering it. I know my mother does not want to live if she loses control of either her mind or her body.
Helpful Answer (6)
Report
reallyfedup Apr 2022
I read about MAiD but you have to be a resident and I think you have to live there for at least 5 years.
(0)
Report
I am thinking of poison herbs / plants as a way out , for myself. Doing the research now , and that will be my Plan B,,, if natural death isn’t going to take me out soon enough.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

I don't know about assisted suicide, but I would probably get to a point that I would stop taking my medication; especially, if my behind is too old and I can't wipe my old butt. LOL People are living longer because of all of the medications they take that are keeping their organs going even though the brain is long gone. It would be nice if the body would still have some get up and go in it, but who in the heck wants to live life day in and day out living on fifty pills a day just so these CEOs of these big pharma companies stuff their pockets.

It becomes a burden on families. One person is sacrificed to give up their job to take care of these folks. The sacrificial lamb or goat is left with not enough money in their retirement savings and will be living a life of uncertainty in their own golden and twilight years. Then you have the family infighting of who is going to do what.

Reading these stories on Aging Care has gotten me triggered because it is a wakeup call to reality. At a certain age, we cannot trash our own lives to save someone else out fear, obligation and guilt.
Helpful Answer (8)
Report
reallyfedup Apr 2022
I wonder how effective that would be. If it's workable, it's a great idea.
(0)
Report
My father had Derek Humphrey's Final Exit on his coffee table. This would have been in the 1990's. It wasn't an issue for him because he died suddenly from a cerebral hemorrhage. The Final Exit Network still exists.

Alzheimer's could wipe out any kind of planning, so you'd have to act pretty soon after it was clear you had it.

Everyone should have an Advance Directive filled out and kept by people who would need to know about it.
Helpful Answer (4)
Report
reallyfedup Apr 2022
I'm aware of the Final Exit group but something didn't work for me when I read it. I should go back and look at it again. Thanks. I do have an Advance Directive.
(0)
Report
SO shared conversations where his father told him that he, the dad, would be ready to check out if he was ever in a diaper, which he now is. That was like maybe six years ago.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report
reallyfedup Apr 2022
It's so easy to talk about ending your life but when it comes right down to it the decision is very hard to make, maybe impossible. My husband has a friend who used to say that he would take himself out with a shotgun. Here he is, years later, living a truly hideous life with an amputated foot, a rotted jaw, and god knows what else.
(2)
Report
Yes. I want to make a pact with my husband. I have 2 grandparents who lived to 98 in nursing homes. Terrible existences. I have a mother who is 91 and immobile. I can't stand her life. She is either on her last legs or oblivious at my visits. Other direct descendants died early because they smoked or didn't frequent visiting doctors. I do my best at almost 66 to eat well and exercise but I fear ending up like any relatives I described.

My frustration with my mother has to do with a number of issues. She has had so many periods dating back to my childhood when she couldn't cope and stayed in bed. She practiced Christian Science. That did not solve two hip and one knee replacement along with countless other issues. I tried to have her be healthier.

During Covid she developed a septic infection. She spent time in a hospital and was released to rehab and then SN. She hasn't walked since. 9 months ago she was dropped by an aid who went against protocol and both her femurs were broken. She then developed a horrific bedsore which she still has. She has to be catheterized. I feel very bad about all of this but there is nothing else for me to do but visit and see countless residents whose quality of life is nonexistent at least from my viewpoint. Crying, screaming for help or totally out of it. I don't know how anyone could want this.
Helpful Answer (10)
Report
reallyfedup Apr 2022
I am so very sorry for you and for your mother. I hope your husband is not as short-sighted as mine. He won't even talk about it. Best wishes to you.
(3)
Report
I think about this a lot and my preference would be to just wonder out in the wilderness and let the animals take me.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report
Riverdale Apr 2022
I just don't feel brave enough to be eaten alive.
(6)
Report
See 4 more replies
I hope to assist myself.. with all the pills we are placed on as we age it should not be hard. I just hope I don;t forget where I put them. ( Still Alice)
Helpful Answer (9)
Report
PeggySue2020 Apr 2022
The pills that old people now take won’t do it. Gabapentin, trazodone, most ss ris can be eaten by the handful without reliably dying. Seroquel, same thing.
(3)
Report
See 4 more replies
I am 68 years old, my father passed when I was a child, and I lost my mom to lung cancer thirty years ago. I thank my mother daily for leaving the way she did. Her cancer had metastisized to her bones but went undiagnosed for 4-5 weeks. During that time, I visited her at home 2-3 times a week, to help around the house or just chat. She was always in a pleasant mood, due to the opiates they used to prescribe :) and we had long, intimate talks about life and memories. We still didn't know she was terminal, but one night she collapsed (she was married). Once she was in the hospital and diagnosed, her mental facilities instantly declined and when she became frightened, I asked the doctor to please give her something to calm her. He did, and she was transferred to a local nursing home where she was put on morphine. When her pain became unbearable, I told the staff to feel free to increase the dosage to keep her as comfortable as possible. She lived the few days it took for everyone to say goodbye, then again, I encouraged the doctor to increase the medication and she peacefully slipped away. I often wonder if the doctor purposely helped her along. I like to think that my passing will be as peaceful and drama free as my mom's, but my how times have changed. I have made my own plans and let my kids know they won't have to go through the pain of fighting with siblings over who is going to take care of me! None of us want to be a burden, but we probably not leave as gracefully as my mom did.

So, now at 68, I see my friends watching and caring for their 95 year old parents, watching them swim upside down like a dying goldfish for what seems like forever, fighting with siblings for time or inheritance, and I am so thankful my parents (my step father, too) went so early and quickly. It is the most loving thing to do. At some point, it will be too late to have any say in our treatment. That is the what scares me the most. Thanks, mom, and don't worry about me, kids, I have a plan.
Helpful Answer (9)
Report
reallyfedup Apr 2022
I'm happy that your mom's ending was not horrible and that you had good time together. I think it is a gross failure of what we call modern medicine that interventions devised to prolong life have instead in many cases transformed people from humans into screaming zombies. Then the laws make people jump through every imaginable hoop to decide death on their own terms. And many states don't even have assisted suicide. It is really wrong. Your mother died 30 years ago. These days, because of the ham-handed response to the opioid crisis, I wonder if pain control has become more uncivilized. I don't know.
(3)
Report
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter