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Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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I saw that you responded to my middle of the night post with a 3 a.m. post. So you may not feel fully rested this morning. Disrupted sleep isn't a problem if it is occasional. Is your mother complaining about not feeling rested daily or several days per week? Does your she act sleep deprived?
Before explaining anything to your mother I'd suggest becoming familiar with information about Sleep Apnea. I like Mayo's website for patient information. www.mayoclinic.com Search Sleep Apnea and see if the symptoms fit your mother's situation. If the symptoms don't fit, don't bother her with the information. The site also has information on insomnia so searching Sleep could give your broader information beyond your specific search for Sleep Apnea. I'd also suggest taking her to her doctor if her sleep problems are disrupting her life or both your lives.
Does your mother have dementia? That would factor into how you frame the information when presenting it to her. If the dementia is advanced explaining might be futile.
There is a difference between rested and FATIGUE. Fatigue is when you feel tired, for no reason. (Plenty of sleep, not much exertion.) Fatigue is when your arms and legs feel like cement......when it hurts and is exhausting, just to wash your hair, or carry a dish to the sink. Fatigue is a big sign of depression, and many other ailments. I would take her to her Dr. and see if it can be explained AND fixed.
I would also look at the medicines she's taking and see if some of them cause insomnia. My mom is on several medications that have insomnia as a side effect. She goes through phases where she's not sleeping well (waking up too early) and complaining, then it will stop for a while, then start again. I've tried everything to help her but now I know it's her medicines and those can't be changed. She also naps (even thought she says she doesn't). I called her last night at 9:20 PM and she was asleep, even though she wasn't in bed. So I think she gets a lot more sleep than she thinks she gets. My mom also says she doesn't dream, which may or may not be true. If you don't dream, you don't get good REM sleep, I think. There are some natural things out there that supposedly help with sleep (tart cherry juice and melatonin for example) but research them before you try them. My mom couldn't take melatonin because she takes warfarin, a blood thinner. I agree with Sonswife that educating yourself on sleep patterns and apnea is a good thing to do.
Blannie, you are exactly correct, if you don't get into REM sleep you will not dream. REM sleep is the most restful and restorative sleep. Lots of things can keep you from REM sleep, Sleep Apnea is only one of them. Looking at the medications is also a great idea.
Have you observed her sleep? Does she snore and have brief periods of not breathing? If she does, I'd suspect sleep apnea. Sleep is disrupted and poor quality. You don't feel rested in the morning. I had a sleep study (doctor needs to order it) and was diagnosed. In addition to not feeling rested, I had terrible frontal headaches when I woke up. My sleep apnea is treated with CPAP and generally I sleep very well. I'm chuckling to myself as it is 1:00, I woke up and am at my computer.
Another thought is day time napping - she might be wrecking her night's sleep by napping in the daytime. Google Sleep Hygiene, you'll find some great tips.
I was reading through these posts and noticed that a lot of people had excellent advice on sleep, but I think your main question was how to explain these things to your mom.
Unfortunately, if your mom has dementia like my mom does, you probably can't explain it to her. The only thing that I've actually found helpful is to give her short simple answers and know that you will need to have the patience to keep repeating those answers. My mom seems able to reason and accept my answers, but she won't remember asking the question and getting an answer five minutes later. As sonswife said, explaining might be futile.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Before explaining anything to your mother I'd suggest becoming familiar with information about Sleep Apnea. I like Mayo's website for patient information. www.mayoclinic.com Search Sleep Apnea and see if the symptoms fit your mother's situation. If the symptoms don't fit, don't bother her with the information. The site also has information on insomnia so searching Sleep could give your broader information beyond your specific search for Sleep Apnea. I'd also suggest taking her to her doctor if her sleep problems are disrupting her life or both your lives.
Does your mother have dementia? That would factor into how you frame the information when presenting it to her. If the dementia is advanced explaining might be futile.
Fatigue is when your arms and legs feel like cement......when it hurts and is exhausting, just to wash your hair, or carry a dish to the sink.
Fatigue is a big sign of depression, and many other ailments. I would take her to her Dr. and see if it can be explained AND fixed.
Another thought is day time napping - she might be wrecking her night's sleep by napping in the daytime. Google Sleep Hygiene, you'll find some great tips.
Unfortunately, if your mom has dementia like my mom does, you probably can't explain it to her. The only thing that I've actually found helpful is to give her short simple answers and know that you will need to have the patience to keep repeating those answers. My mom seems able to reason and accept my answers, but she won't remember asking the question and getting an answer five minutes later. As sonswife said, explaining might be futile.