My sister and I have been taking care of my cousin for a year. He is 74, has mental health issues and type 2 diabetes, which is uncontrolled. He has major OCD and is just non-compliant. He lives alone in a small house. He has fallen 4 times in the last week. He is on Medicaid and there is no home care except a visiting nurse twice a week. My sister is his POA. He is not safe at home and, even though we took on this responsibility after my uncle died, it is getting to be too much. On top of the fact that my sister and I are not getting along, the whole situation is incredibly stressful. I called one nursing home and they said it is a 6-12 month wait. I know if he is hospitalized he will go to the top of the list, but is there anything I can do in the meantime? This place also has a short-term rehab. Can you get into Physical Therapy without being transferred from a hospital?
Your sister can resign her PoA and call APS to report him as a vulnerable adult. They will get guardianship of him and will get him into a facility. But the family will have no say on what facility, and they take over his assets. You'll still be able to visit him but the county will lock you out of any of his personal, financial or care business.
Being on Medicaid does put him at the bottom of all waiting lists, but you should put him on several lists right now. But again, if he's not incapacitated and is non-compliant, don't waste your energies until he needs hospitalization.
They have requirements for care needed that must be met to be eligible for placement. Perhaps a group home if he doesn't meet the NH criteria.
It sounds like you and your sister are getting burned out trying to deal with your lives and prop your cousin up. Hopefully you guys will feel better when you're not having to deal with his day to day needs.