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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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Thought he sent car payment in, we went to bank to get print out of account. He hadn't sent it. Landlord called about our payment it didn't have the extra for new raised rent for 3 months.
abcwangfoo, what my parents did was work as a team when it came to bill paying as they got older. Mom would get the bill out to pay.... Dad would write the check.... Mom would proof-read the check to make sure it was written correctly.... Dad would put the stamp on the envelope and take it out to the mailbox.
Surprisingly they even signed up for some automatic bill paying where the bill would go either on their credit card or pulled from a savings account.
Even when I was younger, I use to write on the calendar when it was time to pay mortgage/rent.
You can have your name put on all his bills as a contact when they don't get paid. I would have automatic withdrawal on bills, like car, that are the same amount every month.
acb, I understand that you are watching him fill out the cheque now, but who is posting it in the mail?
My stepdad was an accountant, he managed the books for a retired employee association, he was very good with money. This week Mum discovered that an important monthly bill had not been paid. He had been diagnosed with mild dementia, but the accountant part of his brain had been working alright until this past month. 3 weeks ago he presented complex financial statements at an AGM.
If your husband's behaviour is changing, then it is important to have him checked out and assessed. Let the doctor know ahead of time what has been happening.
Your husband may not like online banking, but you can use it to keep track of what is happening with the accounts. Even if you do not use it to pay the bills, you will be able to see what is being paid and see what has not been paid.
Are you named on the bank account, or is it entirely in your husband's name? If you are not named on the account, I suggest you make sure you have some funds available in your name. At least enough for your rent. We just discovered that some banks require you to book an appointment to trigger a POA. One bank cannot see Mum until next week, which would be too late if there was a rent payment due.
There is a reason in the business world that there are two signatures on accounts and a third party who is not a signing authority does the bank reconciliations. If you know he is making mistakes, you need to step up and double check that things are being kept current.
You have the internet, why not start using online banking so you can double check that bills are being paid? No need to go to the bank for a statement.
He doesn't have to like it, tell him that it is the modern way and they won't accept cheques any more or whatever you need to in order to simplify bill payments. Losing the chequebook and having to set this up while you wait for new cheques to arrive (a fib) might be a good way to ease him into it.
If he is receiving Social Security income, take him to the SS office, where they will assign you to be his Rep. Payee. It will be required that you keep this money for him in a specially titled account, that he would no longer have access to.
Your POA is not honored at SS. Does he have a diagnosis, that you could bring a letter from the doctor? With cognitive decline comes a decrease in Executive function. But how do you know the bills were not just lost in the mail?
However, I trust your sense that he might require an intervention. I would not wait until there are more mistakes, or the occasional SURPRISE! (My hubs emptied the checking account-and this was WITH the Rep Payee assigned to me.)
Keeping dH informed, asking for his input, telling him it is your turn to pay bills will all be helpful to gain his cooperation. To continue "watching him,", having him report to you will cause a rift in your relationship, and be an attack on his dignity. Growing resentment could lead to a mutiny.
If you feel unable to pay the bills, there are professionals who you could hire to pay your bills. But no one is more interested in your accounts than you will be. Try automatic payments, as suggested by other caregivers. You can run your work by a bookkeeper every three months. Be sure when and if you turn Bill paying over to helpful persons that they report to you in writing monthly, the bills paid and the balances. Or, you could check online all your accounts.
I use gift cards for the expenses for dH, Starbucks, Uber, Trader Joes, Amazon, etc., keeping them refilled monthly. That way he only needs to carry $7 at all times. We shop together, he gets what he wants at those times.
And yes, it is o n l y $7.00 in cash.
Be sure dH has money at all times to carry in his pocket for coffee out. How much is up to you, or he can ask for more.
As a first step, I would access the account online. You can check the balances and see what’s been paid. This doesn’t mean you have to pay the bills on line. That could be a next step however.
REPAIRS for late payments: If you refinance the car at a lower payment and interest, it will be required to have automatic payments deducted from your joint checking account. Ahhh, relief! You don't even have to bank online.
No one dislikes online banking more than me. And automatic payments scared me, but now, I have adjusted my thinking out of necessity.
Keep your credit good for these times, imo. When changing accounts to a credit union, my credit profile shot up 100 points!
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Surprisingly they even signed up for some automatic bill paying where the bill would go either on their credit card or pulled from a savings account.
Even when I was younger, I use to write on the calendar when it was time to pay mortgage/rent.
My stepdad was an accountant, he managed the books for a retired employee association, he was very good with money. This week Mum discovered that an important monthly bill had not been paid. He had been diagnosed with mild dementia, but the accountant part of his brain had been working alright until this past month. 3 weeks ago he presented complex financial statements at an AGM.
If your husband's behaviour is changing, then it is important to have him checked out and assessed. Let the doctor know ahead of time what has been happening.
Your husband may not like online banking, but you can use it to keep track of what is happening with the accounts. Even if you do not use it to pay the bills, you will be able to see what is being paid and see what has not been paid.
Are you named on the bank account, or is it entirely in your husband's name? If you are not named on the account, I suggest you make sure you have some funds available in your name. At least enough for your rent. We just discovered that some banks require you to book an appointment to trigger a POA. One bank cannot see Mum until next week, which would be too late if there was a rent payment due.
You have the internet, why not start using online banking so you can double check that bills are being paid? No need to go to the bank for a statement.
Your POA is not honored at SS. Does he have a diagnosis, that you could bring a letter from the doctor? With cognitive decline comes a decrease in Executive function. But how do you know the bills were not just lost in the mail?
However, I trust your sense that he might require an intervention. I would not wait until there are more mistakes, or the occasional SURPRISE! (My hubs emptied the checking account-and this was WITH the Rep Payee assigned to me.)
Keeping dH informed, asking for his input, telling him it is your turn to pay bills will all be helpful to gain his cooperation. To continue "watching him,", having him report to you will cause a rift in your relationship, and be an attack on his dignity.
Growing resentment could lead to a mutiny.
If you feel unable to pay the bills, there are professionals who you could hire to pay your bills. But no one is more interested in your accounts than you will be. Try automatic payments, as suggested by other caregivers. You can run your work by a bookkeeper every three months. Be sure when and if you turn Bill paying over to helpful persons that they report to you in writing monthly, the bills paid and the balances. Or, you could check online all your accounts.
I use gift cards for the expenses for dH, Starbucks, Uber, Trader Joes, Amazon, etc., keeping them refilled monthly. That way he only needs to carry $7 at all times.
We shop together, he gets what he wants at those times.
And yes, it is o n l y $7.00 in cash.
Be sure dH has money at all times to carry in his pocket for coffee out. How much is up to you, or he can ask for more.
If you refinance the car at a lower payment and interest, it will be required to have automatic payments deducted from your joint checking account. Ahhh, relief!
You don't even have to bank online.
No one dislikes online banking more than me. And automatic payments scared me, but now, I have adjusted my thinking out of necessity.
Keep your credit good for these times, imo. When changing accounts to a credit union, my credit profile shot up 100 points!