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Thankyou everyone, it's very helpful to hear from people that have experienced, similar conditions, I am really trying and have been trying but all the process to get help takes so long, I just need a couple weeks away with, no worries and hearing my name called every 10 minutes, I hope i can find someone to step in for abit, but family and friends is not an option with the carw they need, so I have to rely on government services, I thank you all so much, and I will try take it 1 day at a time, but if I start to feel way to overwhelmed, I will definitely take your advice and call 000 to get an ambulance and be admitted for some help, with everything, to all who replied you are a God send and I can't thankyou all enough, it's good to know people truly care, even for someone they don't even know, it really does give me hope for a brighter future.

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Heppner, thanks for coming back please do take care of yourself.

If I may suggest some little steps you can take. When you are able to get out , don't let yourself think about , your loved one. And every time you do tell yourself, a big fat NO! This is about me, and only me.

Practice mindfulness, put yourself in the moment, not in your problems. Practice, rule of 3, 3 deep breaths, find 3 pretty things, close your eyes and hear 3 things.

If you are feeling guilty! DON'T, you didn't cause this you have nothing to feel guilty about!

And most importantly please don't hesitate to call , emergency numbers for the country you live in!!!! And be sure to get yourself some counseling
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Also, you have to accept the fact that for some things you have no control. So say to yourself as much as you can , " let go let God" or
" Let the marbles fall where they may" what ever works for you.

Religion or not , read the serenity prayer. Change the things that you can, accept the things that you can not.
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AlvaDeer Sep 28, 2024
Exactly. I think that for believers the let go and let god can be so good in so many circumstances. And I couldn't agree MORE with the serenity prayer. Whether you are of faith or not, whether you are in AA or not the serenity pray is the best thing we can repeat to ourselves ever. The shortest and most to the point. The very best thing we can rely upon.
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Have a great respite!
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Thankyou all so much! I've had no luck with finding respite, but honestly, I just want to thankyou all so much! I have no support atm, and just to have you wonderful people, use your time to reply and give me advice and encouraging words, it's so amazing and it gives me faith that some people really do care, I honestly think about youse when im stressing and it honestly calms me down, im not usually one to reach out for help, and i didn't know where to start, when i knew i needed it, like really really needed it, im so happy i found all of you, wonderful people on the other side of the world none the less willing to help, you don't know how your words mean to me, i love you all and God bless! 🙏 If youse would like I can keep youse updated on my journey ahead? ❤️‍🩹
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Anxietynacy Sep 30, 2024
Heppner, I was actually laying in bed, trying to wake up, and thought of you, hopping to hear back from you.

I was where you were 9 months ago.

Caregiving is very lonely, you loose all your friends because love ones are taking all your time , and energy, and the people in your life just don't understand you.

I lost all faith in humanity, it was a very low place to be. Then came on here and was like these strangers are giving me more understanding and caring than anyone in my life.

You should fill out your profile, so we know more about you.

I'm sorry, I was so concerned with your mental health I can't remember, is it your mom your talking care of? Tell us more and maybe others can help you figure out ways for you to get breaks.

How old is your mom? Her health condition? How long have you been caregiveing.

Long term caregiving changes the brain chemistry, it causes a form of PTSD.

I also understand when you say you don't usually ask for help. Oh that's so me! I don't need help, I help everyone else. There is a time when everyone needs help. It is still hard for me to ask questions on here, at times.

Id say stick around, read other people's problems and issue it will help. We are not perfect, this is all volunteers, so sometimes we have bad days too.

If possible get some therapy, ask more questions, we have much good information on self help books and places to get help.

I'm glad we helped you keep up the good work, this takes time to pull yourself out of the holes we dug are selves into. .

🙏🙂‍↕️
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I just read Alva's post and your from Australia, we have a member from there. You health system is probably different than ours. Here if a LO is placed in a hodpital we can ask forca 24/7 evaluation. If found that the LO needs 24/7care we can tell the Social Worker we can no longer care for our LO and have them transferred to a Care facility. If no money, we have Medicaid that can be applied for.

You can no longer do this. Both parents need to be placed. We also have Adult Protection services here. If you have anything similar, call them. This is serious and you need to find help.
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I feel so much better hearing your message to us now, and I just want to assure you that there is no shame whatsoever in getting help for yourself when you are feeling overwhelmed. The truth is that our despair and helplessness can hit us SUDDENLY and if our impulse control is down for the count we can get ourselves in serious trouble. Please reach out for help when you need it.
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