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So he knows usually how to get up and go across his room to the bathroom the whole thing . But once in a while he gets up looks down the hallways for family or circles in room and then just goes in a corner or looks for something to pee in like a vase ? I take care of him 3 hrs a day but not there when he dies this so I’m trying to find tips to help them deal with this and why this may happen ? He is 72 and has dementia . Also at senior center he keeps to himself but tells us he is having a great time talking with others .. even just has stayed outside and didn’t go in ? Never dealt with these issues so not sure what to do thanks in advance if you have any suggestions

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This happens because he has dementia.
His brain is no longer capable of functioning in any normal way.
Behaviors are random and unpredictable and do NOT MAKE SENSE, so that a person who is fully functioning brain-wise can not come up with anything that might work.

Certainly, if this is someone you work with you can see many OTHER instances in which this gentleman's brain is no longer capable of functioning?
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Trixipie Sep 10, 2024
Yes and no . His memory of course is up and down but he still remembers things . And can function pretty well besides telling same stories over and over and sometimes problems thinking a month ago was yesterday or thinking he just did something but didn’t at all that day .. it’s really he just needs constant reminders to go to the bathroom or to use soap when washing hands or to put on house shoes or socks to walk around the home . Things like this .. he usually wakes up to use bathroom it is just odd about the waking up sometimes and looking down hall to see if anyone is looking then he goes in room and goes to the bathroom in corner or like this last instance went into a vase in his room . He says he did it because they force him to drink water but it’s not the water it’s the hiding in room to go to the bathroom instead of just walking directly across his room and using toilet . This is a behavior I have not seen before
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I would make sure that there's a bedside commode in his room. You can also post printed signs near the doorway in large type that remind him to use the commode. Commodes are relatively cheap and can be purchased online or at some pharmacies.

The other issues at the senior center are not abnormal dementia behavior.

For other suggestions, you might try looking on YouTube for Teepa Snow's videos for caregiving loved ones with dementia. She has lots of videos that are very helpful.
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Trixipie Sep 10, 2024
Yes u have thought of that and let them know it might be a good idea but the problem is they gave children and don’t want the urine to get into the carpet and be tracked through the home
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You cannot reason with a dementia patient or use tricks to help him remember to use the bathroom. Signs don't work because words have no meaning after awhile. Staff put signs all over my mother's room about pulling the cord for help, which she ignored, leading to 50 falls in Memory Care Assisted Living alone.

Dressing him in an anti strip suit with a Depends underneath will prevent nighttime urinary accidents on the carpet. You can find the suits on Amazon.

This gentleman should be ushered inside the senior center to make sure he's safe. Whether he engages with others isn't really relevant. He's out and about but should not be left unattended outside the room the activities are taking place.

Understanding the Dementia Experience by Jennifer Ghent-Fuller is a wonderful book available on eBay or Amazon to help you and his family understand dementia from HIS perspective.

Best of luck to you.
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Trixipie Sep 10, 2024
Thank you I will let them know about this book
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"Logic doesn't live here anymore" so trying to make sense out what this man now does or doesn't do with his broken brain is a mute point.
Perhaps it would benefit you more to educate yourself more about this horrific disease of dementia, so you will be better prepared for what lies ahead.
And while putting up signs may help early on in ones dementia journey, this man sounds too far along and I'm sure is not able to read anymore or comprehend the written word.
So best to just have whoever is with him to take him by the hand and lead him to the bathroom and put him in front of the toilet.
Or you may have to do what I did with my late husband and he began making pee messes around the toilet because he only had use of one arm and he had essential tremors in it, so pee would go outside of the toilet, so I made him sit down every time he had to use the bathroom. He didn't like it at first, but eventually got used to it and it became second nature.
And of course there will come a time when he will have to wear adult diapers, and may already be there, and this issue that is a problem now, will no longer be one, and it will be on to the next issue.
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Trixipie Sep 10, 2024
I go with him to do his routines and he does pretty well . It’s just this one issue he’s having trouble with . I worked in memory care facilities but never dealt with this one before . Where he knows where to go and where the bathroom is it almost like a rebellious thing or just trying to get away with something
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In some MC places, they have a big picture of a toilet for the propper door
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Trixipie Sep 10, 2024
Thank you .. he does know where the bathroom is he usually does his routines no problem but the accidents with the going to the bathroom is the issue . He looks as if he is looking to see if anyone is around and then goes ba k into room and does it like he’s getting away with something .
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Trixipie, welcome to the forum. I remember reading somewhere that if you change the color of the toilet seat it would be easier for someone with dementia to see it. Otherwise everything in the bathroom looks white, and that can be confusing. Home Depot/Lowes have colored toilet seats.
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Trixipie Sep 10, 2024
Thank you yes they have a red seat
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Trixiepie,
Thanks for being responsive to our suggestions and making comments.
Has this gentleman had a UTI check lately? You mentioning that this is new behavior for him makes me wonder if he could have a bladder infection causing both more confusion and also more frequency and urgency of urination.
I see you out on Forum already answering others. I love that.
So again, welcome.
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Trixiepie,
Thanks for being responsive to our suggestions and making comments.
Has this gentleman had a UTI check lately? You mentioning that this is new behavior for him makes me wonder if he could have a bladder infection causing both more confusion and also more frequency and urgency of urination.
I see you out on Forum already answering others. I love that.
So again, welcome.
Sorry for duplicate but site slow for me tonight and then double posting. Not that I don't like to see my answers twice and all.
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freqflyer Sep 10, 2024
Yes, the website is crawling this evening.
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As for the possibility of a UTI, getting a urine sample from a dementia patient can be difficult or impossible. Been there done that last week. He can't or won't perform on demand and doesn't understand any part of it.
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AlvaDeer Sep 11, 2024
Would a urinal and the privacy of his own bathroom work at all, Fawnby? They are very inexpensive on Amazon.
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