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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Most of the time I speak to her I think she understands me however she does not communicate back to me so how do I know if she understands and how will she express her emotions and how will I know how to comfort her?
I agree with Windy and Gardenartist, Only answer questions and then with calm veiled truths. Like the child who asks "Where do I come from?" and the parent tells the whole story of reproduction and the child answers"Tommy comes from Chicago."
This is a tough issue that's been discussed previously. I think each case is different. I've always worried about repeating the grief cycle over and over as dementia destroys short term memory. Use your gut feeling here. I tend to go with the avoid and distract method if the dementia is advanced very much.
I know if my Mom died I'd have to go through the whole thing every 10 minutes with my Dad. When it happens I'll be playing by ear and take the easiest route for Dad and me.
How do you know she understands you? It takes time to know what she knows and what she doesn't.Was she close to her son? Will she understand that he has passed? How is her memory? You are lucky that she is older. My wife is only 67. She is a terror. When she gets angry get out of her way. I had her in a memory unit of a n.h.. She never unpacked her bags after a month. I believe the aids were afraid of her.so I took her home. I now have an aid for her 5 days a week, 6 hrs. a day. The aid is absolutely wonderful however she is afraid of her. My wife is so angry and stubborn that she can be a terror. One terrible, terrible, aspect of her disease is that she follows me wherever I go. She is my shadow and it drives me crazy, but even worse is the fact that she won't let me touch her. I have not even held her hand for ten years-this is so sad. Anyway this aid is great and I take it one day at a time.
My experience has been that if (a) the contact hasn't been regular and consistent and (b) if there's dementia and confusion present, I don't raise the issue. When I did, often without thinking of the ramifications, it only produced upset and tears.
Only you can truly answer this question because you know your mom the best. Did your mom see her son on a regular basis, if so I might tell her. If he really hasn't been a part of her present life, I may just let it go. If you feel you should tell her then tell her but perhaps
Treat her like she is still alive. We cannot protect our loved ones, or anyone, from the pain of life, and if you are still living, the pain is part of life. If you are worried that she may become too upset, medicate her for the night just before telling her? Ask her doctor if she can take this news. Be normal about it, get her some flowers, have some friends visit with hugs. Frame a newer picture of her son and display it. SO SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS, was that your brother? Grieve for you and your mom if she is not able. Tell us about your brother. Bless you for being so careful about Mom's feelings.
Not familiar with that diagnosis, but if someone cannot communicate, how would we be able to know what that person understands? CAN you tell us more, about your mother, your brother, and yourself? How are you handling the news?
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
I know if my Mom died I'd have to go through the whole thing every 10 minutes with my Dad. When it happens I'll be playing by ear and take the easiest route for Dad and me.
of a n.h.. She never unpacked her bags after a month. I believe the aids were afraid of her.so I took her home. I now have an aid for her 5 days a week, 6 hrs. a day. The aid is absolutely wonderful however she is afraid of her. My wife is so angry and stubborn that she can be a terror. One terrible, terrible, aspect of her disease is that she follows me wherever I go. She is my shadow and it drives me crazy, but even worse is the fact that she won't let me touch her. I have not even held her hand for ten years-this is so sad. Anyway this aid is great and I take it one day at a time.
You could tell her that she will see him soon. This is a hard one and I wish you the best.
Ask her doctor if she can take this news. Be normal about it, get her some flowers, have some friends visit with hugs. Frame a newer picture of her son and display it. SO SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS, was that your brother? Grieve for you and your mom if she is not able. Tell us about your brother. Bless you for being so careful about Mom's feelings.
CAN you tell us more, about your mother, your brother, and yourself? How are you handling the news?