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I am a 39 year old woman taking care of my 67 year old mother. At this point she does not have a diagnosis because she has refused to go to the doctor for years. I ended up moving in with her last year due to my divorce, and just before my stepfather passed away. At this point I’m making the assumption that she has dementia. I’m sure she has several serious health problems right now. She has a doctor appointment scheduled at the end of this week.


There are some times when I will leave a room and come back in, and she will ask, “What’s wrong?” or “What’s wrong with your face?” There is nothing wrong with me. Sometimes if she says this, I’ll go and look at myself in the mirror without her knowing and make sure I definitely have a neutral face. When I return, she says the same thing. I thought maybe she was trying to instigate an argument, but there was nothing to argue about. She will say this when she is relaxed and also when she is agitated. I can’t figure a pattern to it.


I look younger than my age, and she said the same thing before and after I got Botox. It looks very natural and she doesn’t know I got Botox. So I’m definitely not scowling though.


Today she said, “You were twisting up your face and making faces at me last night and I don’t know why you were so moody.” I was tired, but honestly don’t remember making any faces.


Perhaps this is the beginning of her not recognizing me. She didn’t recognize Jennifer Garner on a commercial we were watching that has been on tv for over a year now.


Has anyone experienced their LO insisting that you are making faces at them when you aren’t? Perhaps it’s a vision issue? She got new glasses last December.

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67 is pretty young for dementia. Is there any way she would allow you to accompany her into the doc appt? Or maybe offer to take her and have her sign the HIPAA release form so the docs can discuss her issues with you, even if you don't get to be in the room with her? You CAN pass the docs a discreet note explaining who you are and her strange behavior and request both a cognitive eval and a UTI test. They will be glad to do it, even if she doesn't sign a release. They get this all the time. A Urinary Tract Infection at her age can go undetected but cause dementia-like symptoms that can be cleared up with antibiotics (but don't have her take Cipro as it is not good for seniors).
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anonymous926138 Sep 2019
Thanks. This behavior has been going on for a year. I initially refused to take her to the doctor appointment because I didn’t want to be involved. We don’t have a great relationship and I have health issues of my own. She tends to blame me for things that I have no control over.
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These sound like delusions.
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Does it happen at a particular time of day? If so, it could be shadows or low light, so that she can't see you properly.
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sundowners....

Have a cosmetic party with her.. Go to tuesday morning or a CVS, and get a facial mask. They sometimes come in animal prints.... Do that together and show her with a mirror,,,, have fun.... GIRLS NIGHT!!!!

I am not quite as old as your mom, but I have horrible face recognition... The Ellen gameshow,,,, the final game, you push the button and say the actor's name on the screen... My GO TO ANSWER WOULD BE:; Hey, I that person looks familiar...!!! I know him....!!! It's what's his face !!! I would get ZERO POINTS.
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my brother got early onset ALZ... illnesses, cancer, etc. don't care who you are, what your are, how old you are... It doesn't matter, these things will hit anyone anywhere, any age....... make the best of what you got... I am still learning this....
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The blame game... it seems to be a one-sided game... Im always on the losing end of it... Lok on the other side, perhaps, this will bring you together, closer...

My mom's favorite saying was;;; TOO BAD...

What happened mom,? Too bad... So, I am beginning to take up that answer...

It seems to fit...
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