Wow, a lot happening on the news from the doctors of my parent, who has dementia. They say he now needs hospice. Although we weren’t close, as sole sibling am I financially responsible? I understand from his girlfriend he has a small pension, savings and social security to cover these expenses. Would they take all of that and if so who covers the expenses of cremation or burial?
Can you tell me what other illnesses or general signs of wasting or failure to thrive has led your parent's doctors to advise hospice? Do you feel you are well grounded in knowing what hospice is (end of life care)?
I advise you look online to educate yourself about Hospice, the mission, how it is paid for, what it includes, what the goal is.
Is your parent able to participate in his or her own care decisions at this time?
If so does the the parent wish to enter hospice?
Are you aware that Hospice means that there is no treatment now toward cure, and that few tests and no diagnostic procedures will be done? Are you aware of medication protocols that are aimed toward relief of any pain or agitation, even if those medications may mean death is hastened by some minutes, hours, days or weeks? Are you aware of all the support there is in hospice from social workers, clergy, grief counselors if needed?
Do a bit of research and it will help you form questions for Hospice interviews. I certainly do wish you the very best. I am sorry that you need hospice, but as a lifelong RN I thank goodness it exists. I wish you the best of luck.
For future needs he may need Medicaid. Each state is different, call the Medicaid hotline and ask all the questions.
You do not need to claim his body, the county or state will bury him, as indignant.
Don't panic, there is help available.
Hospice is usually done in the home but in Dads situation it will be done in a facility. As said, sign nothing. This is the wifes responsibility and her responsibility to hand over financial information. I would think that a judge can subpoena her to do so. Dad is entitled to his SS and pension to go towards his care and 50% of assets.
Let the SW do the job. You really have no way of knowing whats what in that marriage. (U said wife in first post and GF in next) Me, I would not get involved at this point. Let him become a ward of the state.
Hospice is covered by Medicare, Medicaid and private insurance.
Pre pay funeral services now. Doing that you will also be less likely to be talked into something you don't want when you are more stressed. If he is a Veteran the VA will provide a headstone and plaque for the stone. It will not cover the burial. Social Security will also provide a (very) small amount. (But depending on when he dies they may also take back the last payment that is sent.)
With Hospice you/he will get all the supplies and equipment that are needed, a bed that hopefully will have an alternating pressure mattress that can help prevent pressure sores. A Nurse will see him weekly. A CNA will come and give bath, dress, order supplies at least 2 times a week, more if needed. A Volunteer can be requested so that the caregiver can get a break, or the volunteer can help do some chores just let the Hospice team know what help is needed. And Hospice also will cover about 1 week of Respite each year. (This is covered by Medicare/Medicaid, Insurance)
Hospice is one of the best decisions I made when caring for my Husband.
Now 1 more thing, if your dad is a Veteran the VA may be of help as well. Contact your local Veterans Assistance Commission and they can determine if he qualifies for help and if so how much. It could be a little or a LOT.
A lot going on at one time for me, since I’m his only living sibling…
Primary question you need to answer for yourself is who has POA, you or the girlfriend? The POA document describes what authorities the POA now has or not. As POA, I will repeat what someone said, be sure you do NOT sign your name only - sign "Your Name, POA for John Smith."
Your parent's money will pay for his burial. You may use his money to prepay, arrange, etc. For my father, the VA buried him in the military cemetery with a very nice honoring way, engraved and placed a headstone, all for no fee. I thought this was always the case, but evidently others say not so, so be sure to check into your parent's VA benefits early so you don't duplicate and pay for something provided elsewhere.
Since hospice is now ordered, be sure to ask them for guidance for you, what you can expect from them, who to contact, what to expect your parent to experience and how you can help him and yourself.
My sympathies as you go through this. It was not long ago for me, too. Just know some days will be harder than other days, and when they are for me, I just let the day be what it is because I know tomorrow will be better/different. Peace.
My mother died in February of dementia and heart disease, and we're just now having her funeral service this Thursday (she was cremated). I'm sorry you are going through such a thing with your dad, and you have my condolences.
Best of luck with everything.
It, as far as I know is 100% covered. there may be "out of pocket expenses" if you chose to use an In Patient Unit or a Skilled Nursing facility rather than caring for for them at home.
You will get all the Supplies, Equipment that you will need to safely care for them.
A Nurse will come 1 time a week. A CNA will come at least 2 times a week for bath or shower, order supplies and bedding change if needed.
you will have the ability to ask for a Volunteer that can do a variety of things or just sit with your loved one.
A Social Worker and a Chaplain will be assigned as well. That is your "Team" that will help you.
Funeral services, whatever you want will be paid for by the "estate". If there are any funds now make the plans now and pre pay the service. It can be as simple or as elaborate as you wish.
Hospice services (nurse, social worker, an Aide a few times a week, chaplain) are funded by Medicare.
Who is currently caring for your father's needs?
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