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oops .. well I meant to search for that question not post it haha. Anyway, how do others cope with this. It's been app. 10 years of caring for mother .. my sister lives an hour and a half away and uses every excuse in the book not to help me out, yet she makes time for her hobbies and goes on little vacations etc. and she is mother's favorite !!
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I feel your pain!! Mine are useless too! I dread having to listen to them on Christmas talk about their trips and vacation homes while I can't leave my house without Mom!
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Lol! Me thinks me likes you!
I think that is common. It seems to always be the way. My mom was the same way. My brother her pick. Just to save you some heartache. If somewhere in you, you are doing this hoping that in the end,, she will say, oh, you ARE a wonderfull daughter and I love you just as much as bubba, you probably wont get it. I do not regret the short time I was my moms caregiver, but after a lifetime of her treatment I did hope.
Usually, just one person is willing to realy dig in. The rest cry hardest at the funeral. Do it cause you love her and you feel it is right. And id during the process she realizes who is who, then good, sooo good for you. But, if not, you will be alright inside of you. I wish you the most joy with your mom during your caregiving time with her.
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I guess I'm okay with not being the favorite. I just wish she'd at least treat me and husband like family members. She calls us "you two people" .. oh well
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I can understand the feeling. Usually I don't mind if my brothers aren't involved in caring for my mother. I'm usually able to handle things without any major problems. I do have to admit, though, that I get pangs when I see they are on another vacation, having fun at the beach or taking a trip to Hawaii. Still, I know that coming here is a choice I made, so it's not really my brothers' fault that I'm here. If there comes a time I need more help, there are really nice facilities here. There's no reason to bog anyone else down with more responsibility.
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As I have said many times, I have to live with my choices as do my siblings!!
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Amen, A&A.
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