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She doesn't know that she needs to pull down her panties before she sits on the toilet. She no longer can wipe herself.

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You put her in Depends so she won't need to use the toilet anymore. You'll have to do the wiping up part when feces are involved, using wet wipes and making sure she's kept very clean.

Since dementia is involved, things can go downhill very quickly once she takes another 'step down' cognitively. Have you looked into hiring extra help or placement in a Memory Care ALF? You may want to do that, as 97yroldmom has suggested. Not everybody is cut out to take care of toileting a loved one, I know I'm not.

Good luck!
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Jc
Does your mom wear depends type underwear? If not, start there.

It sounds like she has progressed to where she will need more care.

What is your plan for when you can no longer handle your mom’s care?

Some folks hire extra caregivers. Some seek placement in a long term facility.

I would call her doctor and ask for a UTI Test. If she has an infection it can accelerate her decline. It’s always good to rule that out when there is a change in behavior. An antibiotic is needed if that is the problem.

You must keep her clean or her skin will break down. Call her doctor today.
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You need to toilet her on a schedule, meaning someone takes her to the bathroom, pulls everything down and cleans her up before putting everything back in place.

If she is incontinent then adult incontinence products are helpful, but I would keep taking her to use the toilet as long as possible.
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Thanks for the feed back. We are looking at extra caregiving. Really don't want to put her in a long term facility, not just yet. Looking to see if we can find someone who is qualified. If anyone knows of another resource let me know.

Thanks

JC
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