I am getting paperwork together for Medicaid waiver and needed bank statements. Shockingly found out mom's oldest daughter and granddaughter had been stealing funds out of her bank account when she was staying with them out of state for a few months. Funds were taken out through a forged check and taking debit to an ATM. Mom says she would "occasionally" hand over her debit when they need food. I found out almost 7,000 was withdrawn in less than 5 months from a local ATM. Mom does not want to pursue charges as she said it is her family and the money is gone so what difference does it make. Now she does not have the funds available to hold her over at current private pay AL until Medicaid waiver is processed. When granddaughter brought her in from out of state, this was the only AL facility who had an apartment open. Mom and I also thought she had more funds. I am meeting with an elder law attorney this week and hoping he can help her.
I hope that your legal appointment can deal with all this. Best wishes, Margaret
I just edited my post. I saw by your last one you are planning on sending Mom to a facility that takes Medicaid. So making any deals with the AL is not really on the table. So yes, they can ask Mom to leave if she can't pay. So, its either you paying for her care in the AL or taking her home with you. This is a good question for the lawyer. Can Mom be placed in a facility with medicaid pending? For me, Mom had 20k. She was going from an AL to LTC. I placed her in LTC and she paid for May and June. I started the Medicaid application in April so facility aware that Mom was going on Medicaid. I got all the paperwork to the caseworker by June and Medicaid started July1st. Better you place them when they have money then when they don't.
Good thing ur seeing an Elder Lawyer, good luck.
As to what happens? In your particular facility it is time for a face-to-face and heart-to-heart talk about all the particulars in this case. My advice would be NEVER to say to ANYONE any mention of "discharge to our home". Once that happens all of THIS nightmare will look like a good dream.
Not pursuing charges against family sounds all well and good until you have to deal with the severe consequences for doing so. They ripped mom off. They are trash. Perhaps a good talk about what happens next to mom because of the trash sister will wake mom up. But I am sure mom is feeling like a victim already, and just wants it to go away.
I agree the threat of prosecution may be enough to get some repayment. Again, if mom can shift the blame for a lawsuit onto the lawyer and Medicaid, and essentially be able to say there was nothing she could do, it might be easier for her to agree to prosecution.
Mom is no no doubt counting on your goodness and strong sense of responsibility, and is counting on you taking her in. You may need to—but be careful. Best of luck!
I also hope that this particular facility accepts Medicaid or you will have to look for another place and many/most places want "Private Pay" for sometimes 2 to 3 years before Medicaid kicks in.
Is anyone POA for Finances?
Is mom competent?
And yes you can file a police report on behalf of mom. She does not need to do it. When I filed on behalf of my mom and her boyfriend who was being scammed, the police reports came to me, the filer
Mom doesn’t have the $, that’s why she’s filing for LTC Medicaid waiver.
But do you have the money to write a check for the AL bill or ability to put this on a credit card? Because the AL bill is going to have to be paid one way or another. I think you best off doing this and NOT causing any issues for moms Medicaid waiver application. AL placement has way less safeguards as the AL can discharge her “to the street” “to a shelter”. It is not a NH so does not have the requirement for a safe and secure environment that a skilled nursing facility has for a mandatory “like 2 like” placement. The ALs rarely do that as it’s bad public relations but they will call EMS and send her off to the ER and then refuse to take her back. & then can bill storage for her clothing, tv, etc Really you don’t want to go there if you can help it.
Also I would highly suggest that you asap run a credit check from the big 3 on mom. Like do it now online. Just to make sure that happy hands niece did not open up a credit card or do any other borrowing using grannies SS# & credit history while your mom was living in an other state with your Sister and her family. You want this search done before you meet with the attorney. Cause if there was other stuff done, it changes the whole trajectory of this drama. & post an update, ok!
I wish everyone would be aware to start planning ahead of time for loved ones or even themselves. Longterm Care insurance is great, but it too has a time limitation on it. So, we/they may never need a nursing home, but no one can predict the future.
In addition to getting the elder care lawyer, I highly recommend a book (just $20 from Barnes and Nobels), called "How to Protect Your Life Savings from Nursing Homes", by Joshua Rae. It's a quick, easy read of 87 pages with information specifically relating to the individual states as an appendix, and he shares a website for other questions you might have.
It's not really the nursing homes, it's more the various governments (State, Local, and Federal) who look at taking your loved ones hard earned assets. I've been through this for 3 elderly relatives, and I couldn't have protected my own health without the help of the Elder Care Law firm guiding me through the maze.
However, some ALs that are private pay, have a few rooms that are available if funds should run low that they will allocate to Medicaid funded residents.
I am not sure if your Mom is already in the AL or going to be in the AL. If you are already in the AL and the relationship that you have with them is good, and if your Mom is well behaved, then I would suggest you talk to the AL
However, if you don't feel comfortable about asking this question to the AL, you can either have the elder care lawyer talk to them, or get counselling assistance from your state/county's LTCOP organization and see if that facility has a few rooms that take Medicaid patients.
I wish you best of luck on your journey.
Also, I'm wondering (because my mom's in a private AL facility), why would anyone feel uncomfortable talking to the AL facility about such things?
Thank you for helping me understand!
When I researched AL facilites for my in-laws, my first question was: If my folks run out of money, do you have a paydown program? Paydown means that once they've been self pay for a period of time (in our area usually 24 months, but I've heard of 36), they'll get to stay when they go on medicaid. Some said, no, they'd have to move. Those were immediately off my list.
Whether or not, you can find out in your county who to contact to start the "Medicaid long term care" application. Get that started, yesterday. You will find out of the theft is considered money that has to be paid back. It won't be the first time they've heard of relatives stealing from their clients. On the other hand, it wouldn't be the first time someone has tried to say the money was stolen when it was actually given. If they say it requires a police report, you have you answer. You could then verify with an elder law atty familiar with Medicaid long term care rules. They might call them selves elder law but if they just write wills and trusts, they might not know more than you've already found out. Good luck with it all.