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I agree with you ferris I think sleeping your life away at this point while living with dementia seems like a great escape without you even realizing that you're doing it. I too have noticed mom sleeping so much more, but it has progressed so much more through out the last few months. All she wants to do is sleep. I think I feel pretty comfortable knowing that my mom feels at her best when she is sleeping because she doesn't have to think about anything her mind can not handle. Her Neurons are no longer connecting, not allowing her to make impulses. I feel horrible that mom has this horrible disease, but at the same time I am grateful that she is not aware of her sufferings. Unfortunately, I am the one carrying this pain and suffering. I am aware. Hugs to all the caregivers who are in the front line holding it down for your loved ones. You all ROCK!!
Lenette. My mom worked at a Christian School for years. She asks me that question when she does not feel well either. Put on a CD of hymns and songs that she enjoys especially about Heaven and Jesus. I still think a doctor visit to check for infections is a good idea but when they start thinking of those who have gone before more than those who remain, they are ready. God bless you for taking such care of her.
My mother died about 1 1/2 years ago at 85 with Dementia. Although her death was the result of blunt force trauma to the head in a nursing home, she too had begun to sleep a bit more often during the day but wake up during the night and began to wander. Dementia along with Alzherimer's is a disease that leads you through many changes to the point that you do not know what you will be faced with on any given day. Unless this has just happened "overnight" I honestly would not worry about it. Possibly it is her body shutting down along with her mind. I would honestly rather have my mother at home sleeping than be faced with placing her in a nursing home as we had to. Your mother has been blessed with a long life, enjoy the time you have left with her. God Bless You Both!
You know, this is a perfect opportunity for your mom to pray between times she's sleeping because she will eventually enter eternity from which you won't return when you get there, (at least not normally). There are only two places, and this is her perfect opportunity to pray now and tie up any loose ends she may need to tie up before leaving this life. This is also a perfect time for her to get right with God if she hasn't yet already done so. If she has any unfinished business, now would be the perfect time for her to get it done, Because you never know how long you have
would like to thank all of you for the information given to me about my 93 year old mother on sleeping a lot, in my own mind I feel it is the dying process, she does ask me at times why am I still here and why I don't just die, we tell her God is not ready yet (she is a retired Missionary) so she just laughs. But again thak you for all your help.
My godmother who just passed last week was 88 and had dementia, and she slept all the time and would take naps on and off all day on her lounge chair. In her last few months, she did not want to go anywhere any more, and would argue even to go to the doctor's office, so I had a mobile physicians service come to our home here in FL.
I was just thinking of something else besides the dying process that can also cause fatigue is lack of nutrition and hydration. If you think about it, put your self in the shoes of someone who doesn't have very good nutrition and someone who may be dehydrated. You would be pretty fatigued because your body would be tired and trying to conserve energy to survive. This is just something else to consider. What you can do is have her doctor run a special blood test to see where she is nutritionally. If she happens to be deficient in any area, she can either be put on a special diet or given boost or ensure
If it has come on suddenly or over a few days, start taking her temp daily (if you have not already been doing so) and get her in to urgent care or her doctor asap. Sleeping a lot is one of mom's symptoms when she has a UTI. The last time her temp was 98.5 so the nurse was sure she did not have a fever but when i would go to help her dress, she radiated heat. Since I had not yet been able to get a baseline I knew it wes high for her but not how high. In addition to UTI she had traces of Salmonella in her urine. Only found out that 3 weeks later when the county was following up and wanted to know what she hat eaten the week b4 and where it was purchased.
Unless she's going through the dying process, this is definitely not normal. It sounds like she has depression and maybe a lack of motivation. You may want to get her checked out by a doctor ASAP.
My father has a weak heart so tires easily. We try to get him to walk a bit but he gets winded. Really a tight rope there. The more they sleep then the more they can get tired and more unstimulated mentally. Also studies are showing that increased sleep leads to weight loss (likely because they are not eating nor exercising so muscles are just wasting away). If in their 80"s I would say try to keep her up for a bit but in the 90's I agree with just letting her rest. Probably taking everything she's got just to keep breathing. My opinion. Some 990 year olds can ride bikes. How is her heart? Depression?
my mom is 96 and does sleep a lot too. She is on NO meds. Takes vitamins. Gets up to eat two or three to times a day. Will watch a little TV with me, but likes to go and lay down a lot. She has dementia. If we go for a ride I have to make sure I don't over stimulate her, or she has a hard time going to sleep. She will hallucinate. So I try and keep life mostly just quiet for her . She still goes to the bathroom on her own.
my mom is 84 and has what I would call mild dementia. she can dress and shower herself and if she is hungry she will make herself a sandwich or cereal and coffee. She only wants to sleep. If left to do so it would be all the time. My sister lives with her in another state. Sis works third shift so mom sleeps from midnight to late into the afternoon. gets up for a couple of hours and wants to go back to sleep. She does word searches and adult coloring books that I sent her but would rather sleep. her take is "I'm tired, I've done it all these years now I just want to sleep. Dad passed from LBD a couple of years ago which contributes to her depression and desire to avoid all thing social and her desire is to just sleep. Our concern and discussion with her is lack of mobility and muscle atrophy still she just wants to sleep. Sis wakes her to take meds but that is an effort. It is a merry-go-round everyday with no real answers. He check ups and labs are always ok so we don't know what else to do.
Veronica91....well I am another one of those! I will be 72 in June and I spend a LOT of hours sitting here in front of the lap top. And, as long as I knew I was able, post any hospitalization, I would be doing all I could for myself too!! Use it or lose it, this retired RN says. But it can sure be different for those who have a lot of health issues and ARE a lot older! I've seen it so much with my two elderly parents. My husband, is my age, and with his early Parkinson's, I am pushing him about having PT and an exercise program and keeping his muscles strong while he is still early on and self care....just so he can keep up his ambulation as long as possible. Nothing to be gained by saying that one has a chronic problem and will decline and then sit in the chair and let it happen!! I do think, for me, however, that as I get older and more weaker, I could adjust to an Assisted Living place with my hubby. It wouldn't be bingo for me either, but I'd not sit in my room alone!
My understanding of this is that we enter and leave life sleeping a lot. It is the natural arc of life. There are exceptions to every rule and some people do get restless but generally speaking they are shutting down.
Sleeping a lot is considered part of the disease. Their minds are overwhelmed with confusion and sleep provides escape and peace. My mom is 91 and over the year she went from 12 hour nights to 14, then 16 and now up to 18. The doctor told me there is no underlying illness, she still eats breakfast and lunch and consumes water so if sleeping is what she enjoys, use that time for "me".
Glad you are awake this morning FF. During my extended hospital stay I was very willing to get up at 5am but by 5pm I was very unco -operative about not going back to bed. For the same reason I flatly refused to go to rehab! Sure I would do the exercises but I certainly did not want to be socialized. When I got home I got rid of the PT by about her third visit by demonstrating how I could walk down and up the basement stairs. "Wow" she said " most people have to stop and rest before they climb back up, but you did it all at once. Same with the bath aide who made her first visit after i had been home ten days. She suggested we start with a chair bath. "Nope we are getting in the tub" I had the extended shower chair in the bath, stripped off and washed myself, although i did let her do my back. She was such a sweet older woman and remarked that she had never seen anyone do it that way before. After her visit i dispensed with a bath aide. So to sum up I like to sleep when I need to during the day, If I don't lean back hubby finds me a couple of hours later sitting up fast asleep with my hands still on the keyboard. I am now 77 and don't plan on giving up but also ready to accept the things I can no longer do. The one thing I really hate being called is geriatric. I realize geriatricians specialize in the care of the elderly but please don't make me go to one. Let the poor old Moms sleep but that does not mean letting them rot, there has to be a happy medium there somewhere. For me it is not Bingo. Some of the hospital aides found it amusing to see a woman in her 70 sitting up in bed typing away on her laptop.
My mom has vascular dementia and was sleeping 18 hours a day, too. The first time she was sleeping that long, her new doctor took her off a couple of medications. He said that it's okay for her to sleep in every now and then, but not every day. She started sleeping less, but still about 12 hours a day. I figured she deserves to sleep in at her age! A couple of months ago, she started sleeping longer every day. Whenever she does that, I get in a panic about her becoming bedridden. (Plus, it gets rather annoying begging and cajoling someone 20 times to get up every single day.) I took her back to the doctor, but he saw her in the afternoon and she had been up for a couple of hours and was her normal self. He ran some tests to rule out other problems, but said her sleep-wake cycle had probably just gotten off. He did tell her that she needs to be up longer to keep her brain healthy and to avoid other health problems. The other thing I had worried about was bed sores. He said she apparently moves around enough in her sleep to prevent those. I agree with those who said you should take her to the doctor for a check up. If her health is fine and she's not depressed, then finding new things for her to do may help. I got a lovely book recently titled "You say Goodbye, We say Hello: The Montessori Method for Positive Dementia Care" and it has some great ideas that you might find useful. Best of luck to you and your mom.
I have noticed this with my 91 yo mum, as well. She does not have dementia but does seem to sleep A LOT! I don't think she gets a full night's sleep and often sleeps on and off during the day. She will be reading something and boom! asleep for hours then wake up for about another hour and boom! back to sleep again. She seems content but it's worrisome to me. It seems sometimes she's just bored and prefers to sleep. I"m not sure but I totally get why you're concerned. I am, too.
WHAT IS YOUR FEAR? That she might die in her sleep? If she is at peace within herself, please let nature take its course. Work on acceptance and be grateful for the years you have had together. Make her as comfortable as possible. Use mouth swabs to wet her lips if she is breathing through her mouth and her lips look dry.
Before he passed last August, my Dad was in a Memory Care facility for 2.5 years. There was a daily routine, just to avoid this excessive sleeping. People were gotten up and dressed for breakfast. In fact, breakfast was always cooked directly in the kitchen at each cottage, so as to create the wonderful smells to entice people wanting to get up. The other meals were cooked in a central kitchen and brought to each cottage to be reheated and put together. Up and dressed was required daily. There were many different short activities that took place between the meals, to encourage being up, and needing to take a walk from one place to another, for a little exercise. There was a nap time allowed between lunch and dinner...kind of an open free time daily, without an activity scheduled...and some residents napped then. However, unless ill, no one went back into their rooms during the day time. They were in the living and dining room area of each cottage, or going back and forth to an activity to keep them up and stimulated. This encouraged better sleeping during the night too. Of course, at a certain end of life time, people normally do sleep more, nap more as others have stated, but in the facility, that simply was dealt with by having some residents who got ready for bed right after dinner, so to bed first in the evening. My Dad died at 93 yrs after a fall that caused an unrepairable break. Until that time, he was up and going most all day long. While at home, he was sleeping excessively through out the day, so I assume, some of this is just due to lack of stimulation for those at home too.
Sounds like my mother. 92 w/ dementia. She's in bed 20 hrs a day, altho doesn't sleep all that time. Maybe turn the TV to the weather channel. Same "plot" & they repeat it all day! She tells me about the storms in all the places her children live. (8 of us) I could never play cards w/ her, but she plays solitaire on a computer. Her only aches & pains, however, are from the parts of her body that she sleeps on all the time. I got one of those foam "eggshell" mattress toppers and that helped.
Good heavens, when one reaches into their 80's and into their 90's, they have beaten the odds.... they are tired, they have lived a very long life.... they want to rest.
My parents would brag about needing only 6 hours of sleep, but they failed to count all the daily naps which would have risen those 6 hours up to 12-14 hours. I would visit them and always catch them dozing away in the living room no matter what time of the day.
When you get to a certain high age, your eyesight tends to fade, your hearing isn't as clear, and boy your bones sure do ache. Sleeping is comfort for them. Let them sleep.
My mother is 87 with dementia and she sleeps all day and most of the night. She is awake during the evening for about 3-4 hours. We wake her and have her come to the table for meals, appetite is good. I have mentioned this to the doctor and they think it is normal. I encourage her to tdrink water due to all the meds she takes. I always wonder how she sleeps all night, after sleeping all day.
my mom was doing the same. I switched her drs. to mine and he did a full blood work up. she is very anemic and very low vitamin b 12. she got a shot and boosted up her iron.. the very next day there was such an improvement! seemed to be full of energy, out of bed by 8 and ready to go!! maybe your mom needs a complete work up? might just be low blood counts?
If she is in a facility see should be woke up for meals. I would with dementia patients and they do sleep a lot. When the disease progress they tend to sleep more and not want to get up or be brothered we just have to try to encourge them and make attempts not just take no as an answer.
My mother had LBD and she slept a lot towards the end. She was sleeping more and more to the point she would sleep the whole time I would visit. I think it is just the process of the dementia.
When a relative came to stay at my mother's house (she has dementia) - before she got really bad - he said she was up all night puttering around the house. Wrapping things up in newspaper, taping the bundles shut, and then writing long long notes to go with them! Then, during the day when we had expensive paid caregivers come in, she was sound asleep! They had to wake her up, clean her up, get her dressed and 'ready for the day'. Can't win.
Certainly 18 hours is considered excessive. Check with your doctor on her meds, blood sugar levels, and diet. What type of mental stimulation is she getting? Is she losing weight? Is she in a facility or at home...either way, are attempts being made to get her up and dressed and sitting? Or is it too difficult...or easier just to leave it the way it is? When was the last time you had her on a routine that was different than this? Investigating this and documenting it as soon as you can will ease your worries and prepare you for what is coming next. Good Luck!
Dementia takes on a life of its own and each individual is unique. Having said that her brain is not making enough synapses in order to "talk" to other cells, and the serotonin level is depleted (probably). This neurotransmitter is necessary to ward off depression (causing the sleepiness). Since this is a terminal illness, you know her best and what you need to do. There probably isn't much you can do except wake her up to give her fluids. Taking any antidepressant will only constipate her and also make her sleep more.
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For the same reason I flatly refused to go to rehab! Sure I would do the exercises but I certainly did not want to be socialized. When I got home I got rid of the PT by about her third visit by demonstrating how I could walk down and up the basement stairs. "Wow" she said " most people have to stop and rest before they climb back up, but you did it all at once. Same with the bath aide who made her first visit after i had been home ten days. She suggested we start with a chair bath. "Nope we are getting in the tub" I had the extended shower chair in the bath, stripped off and washed myself, although i did let her do my back. She was such a sweet older woman and remarked that she had never seen anyone do it that way before. After her visit i dispensed with a bath aide.
So to sum up I like to sleep when I need to during the day, If I don't lean back hubby finds me a couple of hours later sitting up fast asleep with my hands still on the keyboard.
I am now 77 and don't plan on giving up but also ready to accept the things I can no longer do. The one thing I really hate being called is geriatric.
I realize geriatricians specialize in the care of the elderly but please don't make me go to one.
Let the poor old Moms sleep but that does not mean letting them rot, there has to be a happy medium there somewhere. For me it is not Bingo.
Some of the hospital aides found it amusing to see a woman in her 70 sitting up in bed typing away on her laptop.
My parents would brag about needing only 6 hours of sleep, but they failed to count all the daily naps which would have risen those 6 hours up to 12-14 hours. I would visit them and always catch them dozing away in the living room no matter what time of the day.
When you get to a certain high age, your eyesight tends to fade, your hearing isn't as clear, and boy your bones sure do ache. Sleeping is comfort for them. Let them sleep.